What to expect after AP has left his marriage?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-28-2011
What to expect after AP has left his marriage?
2
Wed, 04-18-2012 - 6:55pm

For anyone who has gone through the experience.....what happens after AP leaves the marriage?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2010
Thu, 04-19-2012 - 12:06am
I can only tell you this from my past experience. My x-AP left his marriage three times, once completely moved out, but went back each time. The comfort of history and routine are hard to break. I am sure your AP feels like the bad guy, taking the blame for leaving, feeling like a failure to his family, all of this is hard to take. He is more then likely fighting some very strong internal battles. I think you need to tell him your feelings for him have not changed and that you want to give him as much space as he needs. Tell him you are there for him and all he needs to do is reach out, but that for right now you feel he needs to work through this and that you will be in the background waiting. Let him call the shots, after all if you want him to come to you, you want him to do it freely and of his own will. Hugs! I hope you find peace in your situation.
~Sunny~
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-28-2011
Thu, 04-19-2012 - 2:51pm

Thank you for your words of support. Sounds like I am doing the right thing by hanging back and giving him time. Its not easy though. When we spoke on the phone after he gave me the news, he sounded hopeful about us making plans and starting to spend time together.