What should I do? Help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2004
What should I do? Help!
5
Thu, 02-26-2004 - 4:38am
New at this. Need some help. I'm married with 2 small children. Well it all started about 9 months ago. I started a discreet relationship w/ husbands permission. Now the "other person" is wanting my kids to call him daddy, he says he wants to have a baby with me, and even wants me to have his name tatooed on me. Is it just me or has this gone WAY to far? Did I mention he is married with children of his own. How do I get him to back off and just enjoy it while it last? Any advice?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Thu, 02-26-2004 - 8:15am
First of all why did your husband give permission to do this? And yes this has gone way to far. You didn't mention how you feel about the OM or your H. But the way it sounds he has gone over the line. Maybe if you two were in love, having trouble with the M, or even talked about this stuff, it would be something to think about. You need to tell him that its gone faster than you wanted and that you need to get things right with H. Sounds like he may want more than you. I'd be careful with this A, it could lead to more problems than you need. Hope this helps you some.


Hot

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Thu, 02-26-2004 - 8:35am
I agree with Hot. This OM sounds seriously obsessed. If both of you are married, why would he want to have a child w/you. Like Hot said, you didn't really tell us your feelings about both men in your life, but it seems like you were just wanting a good time. Sounds like OM is getting a little too serious. And if your H approved the affair, why not clue him in, and maybe you can get away from this guy. He seems a little too aggressive to me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Thu, 02-26-2004 - 9:07am
Hi Kristin, sounds like this OM is a very obsessive type personality. YOu didn't give alot of detail, but I'm gathering you're husband isn't into sex and gave you permission to get it where you can?

Well I assume you want to keep things fun and not too serious. This guy sounds like he's a little too obsessed with you (for whatever reason)than what you were probably looking for.

Maybe you'll have to let him know what your expectations were and what his role in them are (i.e. sex only, not willing to leave your H, not looking for someone to father another baby). I can't imagine you or your H would want your kids to start calling this guy daddy!! You better lay it on the line to him what he can expect from you and if he can't handle it, maybe he's not the right guy to be fooling around with.

Dusty

xxxx
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
Thu, 02-26-2004 - 11:20am
86 this head case.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Thu, 02-26-2004 - 1:55pm

hey kristin -- it's not you, because it sounds to me (and several other posters too) that this OM is somewhat crazy.

CL-Gurlfriend50

Co-CL of My Affair Support Board