What should I tell him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2008
What should I tell him?
2
Tue, 01-27-2009 - 9:45am

I've been chatting online with a MM for 5-6 months and we met 3 months ago but I had become involved with someone several days before we were to meet. I didn't call off our meeting because I still wanted to meet him. Things didn't work with the other MM and all this time this MM was there for me to talk to. He said he had met somebody and they started seeing each other. I let him know I was interested and he said he wasn't giving her up until he saw where it went with us. This was a month ago and we're still talking but he still hasn't made a decision. I told him I wasn't looking for anybody else.

We're suppose to meet in a couple of weeks and a male friend told me not to meet him because it will lead to sex and he's still involved with her. He said I need to tell him to make a choice. I've felt so bad about the way that I did him that I've felt he needed the time to see that I'm sincere but I can't keep hanging by a thread.

Should I just spill out my feelings to him and tell him to make a choice now? Do you think he's had enough time for this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2008
Tue, 01-27-2009 - 11:36am
Listen to your male friend. Men knows men and most of the time the bottom line for them is sex no matter who it is with. Are you all M? If so, then I'd say what is difference. Nobody is serious and it'll just be M people having flings. But, if you're hoping to be a serious contender as the one and only AP for this MM, then don't give up the goodies too easily. Stuff that are gained too easily usually is not appreciated as much.


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"People spend a lifetime searching for happiness; looking for peace. They chase idle dreams, addictions, religions, even other people, hoping to fill the emptiness that plagues them. The irony is the only place they ever needed to search was within."


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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2008
Tue, 01-27-2009 - 11:46am
Yes, we're all married and a girlfriend tells me the other MM is saying this because he's jealous but I don't think so. Funny thing is, the male friend giving me the advice and I are wanting the same thing...something permanent with somebody and not "just a fling". The other MM has pretty much let me know without saying it that he's not leaving his W. But I KNOW he's wanting ONE WOMAN for this "other" relationship. I think that I just hurt him because he's brought it up too many times and I feel he thinks I'll just dump him. He actually asked me if I just wanted him because he was convenient at the time and what would keep me from dumping him again.