What they do that pleases you...
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What they do that pleases you...
| Fri, 04-09-2004 - 7:14pm |
When we first became intimate, I was torn and hurt when he got ready to leave and showered. Well, I was okay with the shower, but as he was leaving, I leaned forward to kiss him and he held me away, only meeting my lips. He explained that he didn't want his wife to smell my scent on him.
I was crushed. Call me naive, but it had never crossed my mind, and it really drove home the fact that he is married. I tried to be brave, but he could see how badly it hurt.
Since that time, he has rinsed off, but never showered off my scent. He waits until he gets home and then he showers. Often, when he returns to work, he'll call me and tell me how good he feels, simply inhaling the remnants of my fragrance.
I know he's running a risk. So does he. But in *this* area, he shows me how much he cares. And Lord, I appreciate it. ::smiles::
What does your partner do that lets you know that you are special?
Cazrida
Edited 4/9/2004 8:14 pm ET ET by cazrida

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It is interesting what you say about dealing with M issues separate from A issues. I do not ask MM about his counseling sessions (he and W have individual sessions as well as sessions together) because they are private and so important. I don't want to have an impact on them and I want MM to feel free to tell his counselor anything. However, he does ocassionally tell me what he has been discussing. I was a bit surprised to learn that one of his "assignments" was to compare how he felt when he met his W to how he felt when he met me. Hmmm... That doesn't seem to be keeping the M and the A separate at all! But then again, since the discovery of our A is what triggered the counseling to begin with, perhaps discussions of this nature are normal. I will say that makes me feel a bit uneasy to know that I'm being discussed... Not sure why exactly. Maybe uneasy isn't quite the right word. Perhaps disquieted is better?
Also - to tie in to your post to the thread by "switch and bait" - I wanted to say that I COMPLETELY agree with what you said about love. Because I love MM so much I want what is best - regardless of how painful that might be for me (or for the both of us). MM calls us soulmates. He has from very early on. I've been more reluctant to embrace that term, mostly because I'm not sure how to define it. I will say that what we have between us is unique and special and has an entirely selfless quality to it that alternately hurts like hell and is overwhelmingly sweet.
Anyway, thanks again for your thoughts and support - I hope you are getting through the weekend OK. I know how darn hard they can be!
GB2
First of all, like your man, my SO only washes his hands and rinses his face when leaving me. There's all sorts of baggage tied up with my exh/cleaning up after sex, and my guy is sensitive to that so he won't do a full cleanup...just enough to get past his and g/f's dog, lol!!!! The damn dog *knows* every time when he's been with me!!!!!
Another is that he 'saves' himself for me more often than not. I can tell when he's had sex with his g/f and generally about how long it's been since he's had any release. It seems like he tries to make sure he's good and ready for me. I know that he does without at home to make sure that happens. He may be taking care of her, but he's not letting himself get spent right before seeing me. It's kind of wierd, but that means a lot to me.
He is always caressing me. I really love that.
He gives me cans of his body spray to put on the stuffed animal I sleep with so that if I can't sleep with him at night, at least I can sleep with his smell -- and he does it without laughing at me about my snuggles bear!!!
He does things for me around the house. He's bought things for me to give to my kids for Christmas and birthdays because I wasn't able to afford it. He's turned down many, many profitable offers on his car because he's giving it to me later this year. And he really needs the money!!!
I can't list all the wonderful things he does to show he cares. He's an extremely loving, kind, and generous man, both with material things and the intangibles.
Lucky
Running a finger across my cheek,
Playing with my hair,
Kissing the top of my head while I was resting against his chest,
Thumbing my nipple, over clothing,
Calling me "Bella",
Calling me "Red",
Sending me a quick email "I have to step out for a bit, I'll talk later", then upon his return emailing "Hey Red, are you there?"
One time we met in a very public parking lot, and he pulled open my car door and "planted one" on me like it didn't matter who saw us,
And even on our very last day together telling me "If we weren't both married, we'd be getting that apartment" and "There will never be another Red for me!"
Thanks for letting me share my wonderful memories.
Red
This is how MM pleases me:
The way he eats me up with his deeeeep blue eyes. He has this way of staring at me that makes me lose control.
The fact that he always makes sure to call me every day of the workweek, probably at least 2-3 times, and weekends if he can. He almost always answers his phone when I call, even if he can't talk. That's more than I do.
The way he seems like he wants to be caught. This scares the **** out of me, but at the same time makes me feel wonderful. On one hand, he plays it like he doesn't want to be caught. But then takes me to public places, where we run into people he knows!
He's introduced me to most of his family. Not, of course, saying that I'm sleeping with him or anything. But introducing me as his friend.
The way that we never seem to ask of each other more than we can give to each other. We understand that our lives are complicated and give each other the space we need when we need it.
The way he tenderly holds my hand whenever I get in the car with him.
Sigh, it is the weekend, and our contact is limited...:( I want to be with him right now........................
He IMs me almost every morning to say, "I thought about you last night/this morning" and then proceeds to tell me what he thought about...in detail!
When we're together, he always looks me in the eyes, touches my hand and smiles this wonderful smile and I know that there's no place he'd rather be.
H & I went on a trip this weekend and on Friday, MM IM'd me to tell me to have a good time and he said "I'll miss you." First time he's ever said something like that. Usually, we say, "I'll miss talking to you" or something along those lines. But he said he would miss ME. Such a simple thing but it had me floating on air.
He talks about if we were both single and dating...places he'd take me, things that he'd do for me...and it always makes me smile.
I could go on and on. Obviously, he pleases me in so many ways.
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