What's he thinking?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2004
What's he thinking?
13
Tue, 03-09-2004 - 6:58pm
Hi all

I have had this on going email thing with a MM. Sometimes is gets very steamy but he has no interest in taking it to the next level. I should count my blessing because I know it would end in disaster. My question is....what is his continued fasination? I mean really...you can only cover the same topics so many times. However, when I try NC it is evident...he doesn't want me to go away. Any ideas what he may be experiencing?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2003
Wed, 03-10-2004 - 2:23pm
Dusty, I agree with you on this one. I feel just as you do. I wanted to have ic with someone other than my H, I was not satisfied with the e-mail thing only. After 4 months of e-mailing, I was so frustrated it was driving me crazy. Then when we got together at my asking, he would not go all the way. Sure, the little playing around we did was fun, but then I got more frustrated. It was a very long 6 months later when we finally had ic. AND, like you said, he got so freaked out by it (and he's single too) that it was it for him. He said that night it could never happen again. Some guys just seem to freak out at the ic thing. I will NEVER figure that out. I didn't have a problem with it at all, I felt I was already cheating. It's weird, but I see it this way. A body part is a body part. If it's a finger or a c**k in there, what is the big deal. Cheating is cheating. Sorry to be nasty if that was, but know what I mean. Anyway, thinkingtomuch, just ask him like I did. I started kind of kidding around with him like 'you know people would stop going to baseball games if no runs would ever score, they would finally just lose interest'. Then I finally just came out and asked him and told him I wanted more. Unfortunately, he had more issues with it than me because I was married. I'm still trying to get over the jerk. Good luck to you, C
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
Wed, 03-10-2004 - 2:35pm
I suppose I'm at the other end of the spectrum. My MM was very patient with me in the sex department. When we first started getting intimate, it was mostly kissing and heavy petting...I had drawn a line because I don't have IC unless I'm emotionally connected. He said he agreed...he had to have feelings before having IC too, so to him, the wait was alright. After being together for 2 months (can't believe it took so long), we finally did it. And it was the best ever! Granted, I've only been with 3 men (counting MM) and it was wonderful. And whenever I think about getting with MM again, here come the butterflies!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2004
Mon, 03-15-2004 - 11:50pm
I hear ya loud and clear. Read my "I am a fool" or email me directly. I'm in teh exact same boat with this cyber-sex thing.

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