Who has more power?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2010
Who has more power?
7
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 8:57am

Yeah,who has more power in your A? Who calls the shorts? AP or you?

Its a one line question but IMHO , carries all the tune of the A- the good,the bad and the ugly !

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 10:45am

Sad to admit it, but my AP (MM) has all the power. I guess it is because our times together revolve around his availability.

TanZa2920
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2009
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 11:33am

I'd love to say that I'm holding all that power.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2010
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 12:19pm
My AP.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2010
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 12:57pm

" I think he also does a good job of not abusing that power."

Jane, this statement is so powerful and spot on!

Misuse of power is what leads to so many sad stories we read here.The nature of the As is such that once the imbalance is there,the entire dynamics change.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2010
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 1:52pm
I agree that imbalance causes of lot of the issues we see...
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2010
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 5:45pm

Hmmm...AP #1 has more power and know it. Totally sucks sometimes. But other times...when I force myself to hold back and not text or call, he will be the one to do it...but for the most part I am the one doing the work and he is along for the ride. LD so it's not like we ever see each other...I guess it's really just more of an EA now. First AP and I let emotions get involved.

AP #2...too soon to say. So far things have been equal with regards to texting, messaging etc. He made all the arrangements for our getaway...says all the right things...and this time around...I am guarding my heart!


That's not to say that there are not emotions involved...I couldn't do this without emotions being involved...but it's nothing like it is with AP #1, where we talk about our days, jobs, future, etc. With AP #2, eventually it always leads to sex:-)))

LouLou
LouLou
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-03-2010
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 11:35pm

I think it's pretty balanced between us, although I might have a little more of the "power".

anotherseyes