Well if it helps you to sleep better.....I am eagerly waiting for my EMG to arrive tomorrow for two wonderful days together. I get an over welming amount of voice mails, IM and emails daily to help remind me that I am not just the "cake he is eating". If you truly believe in your heart that Love is the magic you share, then dont let a simple chat room bum you out. Just read, so that you are not blindsided to what may and may not happen. Everyone is different, and I truly hope that things work for you. I found pure happiness in my EMA, im just unsure personally how much longer I can wait for the EMA to end and the out of the closet romance to shine!
What a great question to lift our spirits lexylew!
It was three months into our relationship and I remember that i was so difficult being with him thinking that I had crossed the line by letting my feeling get to the point of loving him or should I say falling in love with him. He said, "What's wrong? you look so sad." I told him that I was fine and we had left the bar that night. He pulled me aside and said that he wasn't going until I told him what was making me so sad. I din't want to tell him and he started getting angry because we said that we would always tell eachother what we were thinking. We took seperate cars to a nearby park-it was the longest ride of my life. I thought I was going to lose him that night because he knew I was lying to him when I said things were fine. When I got into his car he said he wanted to know what was wrong. I started to tell him how sorry I was that I had broken a promise I had made him. That being that I would keep my feelings in check. That we both understood eachothers circustances and situations. He stopped me and held my face with both hands. I remember my MM saying, "You don't get it do you? I've fallen so hopelessly in love with you-I love you" Thats when I came clean and told him that I loved him. When we went our seperate ways he called me on my way home to tell me again how much he loved me. He said that he had broken a promise too-he fell in love with me.
He told me about a month and a half after he contacted me that he was in love with me from the day he met me. He was afraid to tell me because he thought I would end the contact, since we are both married. He didn't want to lose me because of it, but I was glad he had been honest with his feelings and it wasn't long before I was swept away.
We both said I Love You at exactly the same time. As with everything in this R, we are always on the same page!! It was VERY early on in the A. I was intending to say it first, but somehow we both came out with it at the very same time.
Little did we know what that meant at the time. Or how much it would change and grow in a year. We have had many ups and downs, but our feelings for each other is one thing that is never in question.
You're looking for some positive stories? My R with MM is going wonderfully. ALOT of big things are happening in my life. Changes that will allow for much more time with him than I get now. For those of you who may know my story, MM and I had not had IC in almost a year last time I posted. But Friday.....WOW!!!!!!!!!! The lack of *frustration* sure does help the attitude!!! I just have to try to keep myself from getting addicted to it!!
I told him first. I told him two Sundays ago; we've been together about 3 months now, almost, although we've been friends for over a year and a half. I didn't get involved with him until my feelings were pretty deep and strong already, so it didn't take long to get to love once we got so much closer. He actually kind of pushed to hear it. He knew how I felt, even though I was dancing around the word. He finally just said, is that truly all you feel? To which I had to be honest and say, no, I love you. Made him real happy. :-)
He still hasn't told me the big L word, though, and that's okay, because you know what? I really don't need to hear it. I know he cares very deeply for me. He tells me that much, but he also lets me know by how he treats me and how he speaks to me and with all that we share physically and emotionally. He may fall in love with me sooner or later - and that would be great! - but even if he doesn't, I am completely content right now with the way things are, and he knows that. Absolutely NO pressure from here for him to say it. He either will or he won't.
I think it's used too lightly anyway. I've only told him twice, I think, and once I referred to it in a an email, and that's all I've mentioned of it. I don't want to fall into the same trap I had in my marriage where it became rote and routine to the point where it meant nothing anymore. So, I only say it when the feeling is overwhelming.
I had a very similar situation with my MM. Although I said the words first, we were out with work people and looked at me at one point, right in the eye, and said "Do you know how I feel about you" and I shook my head no, because I wanted him to tell me. And he says in my ear (I can't remember too much because I was drinking sour apple martinis at the time), "I care about you so much, and I will feel this way forever and ever and ever." or something like that. And I smiled and mouthed to him "I love you" and later I finally told him several times aloud.
He never said "ILY" back that I can remember, but he did tell me he shows how he feels through his actions, and there are the little things that I know are him telling me he does love me. After I told him, I had hoped he felt the same as I did, he said "I can't believe you ever doubted." At one point, he kissed my cheek and said "love"...so I pretty much feel that he does love me back. Like Lucky says, though, it doesn't matter to me that he doesn't say it. He doesn't even have to love me back either, I am happy giving my love to him, and getting whatever he can give.
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thanks for answering the question!
LOL
It was three months into our relationship and I remember that i was so difficult being with him thinking that I had crossed the line by letting my feeling get to the point of loving him or should I say falling in love with him. He said, "What's wrong? you look so sad." I told him that I was fine and we had left the bar that night. He pulled me aside and said that he wasn't going until I told him what was making me so sad. I din't want to tell him and he started getting angry because we said that we would always tell eachother what we were thinking. We took seperate cars to a nearby park-it was the longest ride of my life. I thought I was going to lose him that night because he knew I was lying to him when I said things were fine. When I got into his car he said he wanted to know what was wrong. I started to tell him how sorry I was that I had broken a promise I had made him. That being that I would keep my feelings in check. That we both understood eachothers circustances and situations. He stopped me and held my face with both hands. I remember my MM saying, "You don't get it do you? I've fallen so hopelessly in love with you-I love you" Thats when I came clean and told him that I loved him. When we went our seperate ways he called me on my way home to tell me again how much he loved me. He said that he had broken a promise too-he fell in love with me.
How sweet is that!!
thanks for sharing
Little did we know what that meant at the time. Or how much it would change and grow in a year. We have had many ups and downs, but our feelings for each other is one thing that is never in question.
You're looking for some positive stories? My R with MM is going wonderfully. ALOT of big things are happening in my life. Changes that will allow for much more time with him than I get now. For those of you who may know my story, MM and I had not had IC in almost a year last time I posted. But Friday.....WOW!!!!!!!!!! The lack of *frustration* sure does help the attitude!!! I just have to try to keep myself from getting addicted to it!!
CFH
He still hasn't told me the big L word, though, and that's okay, because you know what? I really don't need to hear it. I know he cares very deeply for me. He tells me that much, but he also lets me know by how he treats me and how he speaks to me and with all that we share physically and emotionally. He may fall in love with me sooner or later - and that would be great! - but even if he doesn't, I am completely content right now with the way things are, and he knows that. Absolutely NO pressure from here for him to say it. He either will or he won't.
I think it's used too lightly anyway. I've only told him twice, I think, and once I referred to it in a an email, and that's all I've mentioned of it. I don't want to fall into the same trap I had in my marriage where it became rote and routine to the point where it meant nothing anymore. So, I only say it when the feeling is overwhelming.
Lucky
I'm glad you're doing great!! Thanks for the reply!!
=)
Edited 9/19/2003 1:02:40 AM ET by lexylew
sounds like you've got a good deal going!! with your EMA... the L word is used too lightly, you're right.
=)
He never said "ILY" back that I can remember, but he did tell me he shows how he feels through his actions, and there are the little things that I know are him telling me he does love me. After I told him, I had hoped he felt the same as I did, he said "I can't believe you ever doubted." At one point, he kissed my cheek and said "love"...so I pretty much feel that he does love me back. Like Lucky says, though, it doesn't matter to me that he doesn't say it. He doesn't even have to love me back either, I am happy giving my love to him, and getting whatever he can give.
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