Why am I a doormat?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2009
Why am I a doormat?
5
Tue, 08-25-2009 - 10:53pm

Why do I do this to myself?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2004
Wed, 08-26-2009 - 12:10am

Hi roller,


I feel like I'm obssessed alot of times. I'm pretty much available to him 24/7. I try not to be. Sometimes he calls and I don't answer just so I can feel I have an ounce of control. Then I pine and wait and hope he calls me back and wonders what I'm doing. It's so stupid, sometimes I laugh at myself and other times I want to cry.


Dont know what advice to give because it's hard for me too. Maybe you should focus on seperating from H. You probably would feel some relief once thats done. My H and I seperated about a month ago and I feel relieved but sometimes that makes me want AP more. But i do feel like I took a step toward my happiness. Then on the other hand I get so frustrated with myself and AP when things arent progressing the way I want.


I look at my life sometimes and think the same things you think. How did I get into this mess? Who am I? What was I thinking?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2007
Wed, 08-26-2009 - 8:35am
Think about it this way. You were strong enough to end a bad M. That means you have a lot of strength and resolve. Now that you have ended one toxic R (obviously it was because you ended it), then why are you entering another toxic relationship? Ask yourself why would I have enough courage to end a M with someone where I wasn't treated with the respect and dignity I deserve only to start another R with someone who is even worse because he is living with, sleeping with, and sharing a life with another woman; and I am not his priority. Ask yourself if you really want to put yourself in the backseat of a man's life and continue to push and pull on someone who is already taken by someone else. JMHO I really believe that you should focus on YOU. Get into T and really discect yourself and find out why you continue to settle for someone who doesn't realize your wonderful beauty. Congratulations on having courage and strength, now use it on you and find someone who eminates your strength and beauty. You can do it. You can stop yourself from this madness if you make yourself a priority.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2008
Wed, 08-26-2009 - 10:12am
((Hugs)) to you! I know exactly how you feel! My A started out as him chasing me, then once he caught me
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Wed, 08-26-2009 - 11:00am

This was me three month ago.

“"Truer words were never spoken -" Ah, but true words leave hearts broken! Truth is only for the wise - Lovers ought to stick to lies”

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2009
Wed, 08-26-2009 - 1:00pm

I just don't understand what we are all doing here.