Why do I need to have control?
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| Thu, 05-27-2010 - 12:37am |
Hi all
Just a quick one for you. My AP and I are in a good place now. We seem to have got through the highs and lows of the first year and settled into a lovely A. Contact is initiatied by us both, we both suggest lunch/coffee, he always pays which is lovely and we play when we can.
We went away twice last year (overnight in nearby city) and it was great. We are going away again in 3 weeks (cant wait!!!) I felt bad about being the one to ask if we were getting away soon (but he seems to recall it being his instigation to pick the date) so he must'nt view the whole thing as being driven by me- which makes me feel better because I love going away with him and I have raised it a few times over recent months.
So... the issue is- I am already worried there wont be another 'getaway'. By rights we should plan to get away in Nov but I dont want to mention it incase I look like Im needy and need to have things all planned out. But this is the truth- I like having things planned out with him as it makes me feel happy to think that we will still be together then- what a sap I am.
I am actually smarter than this. I know that even if he promised me the earth- its not reliable as we are both M and have busy lives- and although we both may desperately want to get away- its just not always possible.
So here I am- writing a reminder in my mobile phone for the day we are planning to go on our trip 'DO NOT TRY TO PRE-EMPT NEXT TRIP'.
Why cant I just relax and go with the moment! ARGH I annoy myself some days.

Hey don't apologize for your personality! You like things planned out, you like to know what's gonna happen and when. You're probably like that in a lot of areas of your life. I have a friend like that. If we go to the beach, she wants to know what time we're leaving, whether we are eating dinner out (and where!), and what time she'll be home. I like to lay on the beach till I'm hungry, eat where and when the mood hits me and get home whenever I feel like it. She drives me nuts with her having to have every detail planned in advance, but that's the way she is! Maybe you're not exactly like that, but you do like to know things in advance.
You're right to try and NOT bring up that next trip quite so soon. It seems like, in an A, a "last minute" trip works out better because you both better know what your schedules are, etc., closer to the time. Try to go with the flow a little more. :-)
You've got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you're not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice. ~Steven D. Woodhull
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