your input would be appreciated

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2008
your input would be appreciated
10
Thu, 09-18-2008 - 3:45pm
I posted this message on anther board and thouht I'd post
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
Thu, 09-18-2008 - 5:27pm
Your right this is not a road that you should go down. I know from experience. Having an A will take you to the top of the world one minute, and then send you crashing down the next. If you have to, fire this guy, just get away from him. It sounds like you have a pretty good marriage, maybe a little stagnant, but still good. Spend the time you think about this other guy, and use that energy on rekindling the flame w/ DH. Take it from one that knows, this A thing ain't for everybody. I NEVER thought that it would be for me, yet here I am. It has very painful moments after the feelings get involved, and they will if you do it for any length of time. You will find yourself constantly second guessing everything he ( AP) says and does. You will learn very quickly your areas of insecurities. It's just a very tough thing to live through. A lot of us on here had As because our marriages were all but over. We had husbands that had become neglectful to the point of no return. That doesn't sound like your situation. Whatever you decide I wish you the best of luck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2007
Thu, 09-18-2008 - 6:03pm

Wow -


I want everyone considering starting an A to print this reply from Justice - and paste it in front of their noses!!!

lightning in my heart

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2007
Thu, 09-18-2008 - 10:59pm

No matter how happily a woman may be married, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice man who wishes that she were not."


- By H. L. Mencken


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
Fri, 09-19-2008 - 7:14am

Make a list of what you stand to gain by continuing with this A (which is clearly heading to the physical step).

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2008
Fri, 09-19-2008 - 1:40pm

Thanks all,


I know you all are right but its just so hard to keep my emotions in check. I'm a grown woman but I feel like a teenager.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
Sat, 09-20-2008 - 4:50am
Awww shucks tgrbabe, now you went and made me blush,(and that ain't no easy task lol.) Thank you that was kind of you to say what you said
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2008
Sun, 09-21-2008 - 12:38pm

Hi,


You're all so right, my brain know that he's most likely playing me, but I still don't know why I feel so happy when I speak to him. How do I get him out of my mind?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2008
Mon, 09-22-2008 - 11:56am

Hi,


I know I could not erase all contact since we do have to work together to an extent.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Mon, 09-22-2008 - 6:31pm

Work place affairs are the absolute worst when they turn sour.


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2008
Mon, 09-22-2008 - 6:57pm

Hi Clarity,


I am so grateful for you taking the time to respond to me. Everyone helps me so much, and you've set me straight and you're right. I should take his remarks as offensive and downright disrepectful.


I just need to find a way to get him out of my head now and just so you know I really do feel cheap for allowing him to get to me like this. I 've been married almost 17 yrs and have only ever been with one man, my DH, so this is really awful that I would be tempted like this.