Well TG, I want you to be passionate again!
The trouble with these language patterns and grotty framing is that they can manipulate or trap us in places that are not in our interests to be.
And self-talk is one of the worst.
"I want you to be passionate again!"
I want to be passionate again as well.
One of the dangers of staying in a situation, even if you are making personal changes, is that you can become unaware of the costs and damage that are done.
"What if the two of you agree on some innocuous gesture on her part--such as twirling your wedding ring around your finger--is her signal that she's initiating?"
Yes, that's a reasonable progression through the problem solving algorithm, and I tried a couple of different approaches over the years from refrigerator magnets changing position to what perfume she'd wear.
Interesting, and shyness can be a significant part of the equation.
"Suffice it to say we suffer from the combination of low libido and a painful degree of shyness about sexuality."
Any chance she'll see a therapist out of love for you?
a woman in 2012
Bizarre to be sure, and illustrates the damage that done in upbringing and societal messages.
I suppose these things vary from mushy fillers to positively poisonous.