Questions for HL Women

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2009
Questions for HL Women
42
Wed, 10-12-2011 - 9:44pm

(deleted post)

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2009
Tue, 10-18-2011 - 4:26pm
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2011
Wed, 10-19-2011 - 12:42am

So, I don't think introversion or extroversion is a good indicator of base drive.

That's very interesting.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-20-2011
Mon, 10-24-2011 - 9:45am

1. Did your DH's libido drop after he married you? If so, any idea why?

We're not married but it changed after we moved in together.

2. Did you sense that he was LL but married him anyway because you felt he would be faithful to you?

I thought he was as into sex and all that goes with it as I was - he'd told me he couldn't believe he'd met someone so matched to him in this way.

3. When you wear lingerie, does that do anything for him?

I have loads of lovely lingerie and

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2009
Mon, 10-24-2011 - 8:37pm
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-20-2011
Tue, 10-25-2011 - 4:55am
Thankyou for your reply :) Yes, it's incredibly hurtful and painful, and at times very difficult to hold back the tears (I do actually burst into tears over this a few times a month, hormones make me hornier than usual I think, and it's even worse then!) But me moping about it just increases stress so I'm trying to concentrate on other things - keeping fit and getting a social life are my priorities at the minute, they're helping to bolster the confidence I'm losing through rejection. Thank god for this board, it's good to know I'm not alone. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2007
Fri, 12-23-2011 - 3:49pm

He is an introvert and truly only has one or two friends aside from me. He either wants to spend time with me and the kids or be alone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2003
Fri, 01-06-2012 - 4:27pm
1. Did your DH's libido drop after he married you? If so, any idea why?

No looking back I think it was always low. It has prob dropped more since I stopped pushing the issue. Although it may not have dropped he might just not be humoring me anymore

2. Did you sense that he was LL but married him anyway because you felt he would be faithful to you?

No. Didn't really realize it until a couple years into marriage.

3. When you wear lingerie, does that do anything for him?

No. or at least it didn't. I can say I have worn any in several years.

4. Can you think of any ways you've changed that could be affecting his libido?

Wow that's a loaded question. I am sure I have changed. So has he. But did I cause him to have a LL? I don't think so.

5. Have you ever stopped initiating sex to see how long your DH would go without having sex with you if you didn't initiate? If so, what happened?

I have. We are working on 22 months without sexual contact.

6. Do you think he ever watches or looks at porn?

No. Could be wrong but unless you consider football porn I don't think so.

7. Do you think he ever masturbates?

I want to say no but he might. I dont think I want to know if he does as that would just plain hurt.

8. Does he give oral? If so, is he any good at it?

No. Only ever did rarely.

9. Does he seem to enjoy receiving oral? If not, have you stopped giving it, or do you give it anyway--not for his pleasure but for yours, perhaps? (This question is for all women:
Jen
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2003
Fri, 01-06-2012 - 4:28pm
Jen
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2009
Fri, 01-06-2012 - 9:11pm


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2003
Fri, 01-06-2012 - 11:34pm
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We did at one time. We talked it to death really and I think the talks did as much damage as the lack of sex did. It is the elephant in the room nowadays. I think he knows I could tell you exactly how long it has been, but it has only been mentioned a couple of times in the 22 months usually when I am so angry by it I am about to blow. He acknowledges that it has not been good on us and that it should change. I believe the last time he had a list of things he wanted to change about himself. He said he thought it would make him feel better about himself and things would change. That was probably six months ago.


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Jen