The day time comment may be he is not comfortable about his body and doesn't want to be seen naked in the light. Contrary to what most women believe men can be justs as sensitive about their body image as women.
Second the ejaculation thing could be medical as in a medication he is taking. Paxil, for example, is well known not to allow ejaculation. It could also hinder his erections.
I think women are often mistaken to think us men has some sort of mental control over our erections. It is an involuntary reaction. It' not like sending a mental signal to your bicep and causing your arm to bend. We don't think"she boring or unattractive so I'll keep my penis soft." Doesn't work that way. We cannot will it to be hard anymore than we can will it to be soft. Basically it's not in our control. If it was the makers of Viagra and the other ED drugs would be out of business. If he found you unattractive he wouldn't touch you at all