Don't ever feel like doing it anymore...

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2008
Don't ever feel like doing it anymore...
12
Wed, 01-23-2008 - 5:14pm

My boyfriend is kind of upset because he thinks that I'm not attracted to him anymore because I don't ever want to have sex.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2007
Thu, 01-24-2008 - 3:46pm

I don't know how to talk to him about that, because I don't want him to think it's his fault.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 01-25-2008 - 4:45pm

Do yourself a favor and take charge of/responsibility for

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2008
Fri, 02-01-2008 - 1:43pm

Hey don't worry, its not the end of the World and it takes two to tango, so think on that.! Yes you do need to talk to your boyfriend and tell him your feeling and that you don't have an orgasm, he must wait for you and find out what pleases you and what

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2007
Fri, 02-01-2008 - 3:19pm
Hi! Well I think if you are not enjoying sex and getting nothing out of it then of course you are not going to want to do it. I agree with the others. You could get some books or do some googling and have info ready for your boyfriend so he understands that it takes far longer for a woman to orgasm. I went years thinking sex was just a job I had to do but got no pleasure from it. I finally got up the courage to tell my husband that just because he is finished does not mean I am and we did some research, watched videos and have read books on foreplay, giving proper oral sex, gspot, erotic massage etc. Gosh I never knew you could orgasm incredibly with out the actual intercourse. Definately talk to him. Use the word I alot rather then you that way he doesnt feel less like a man. He just needs some guidance to let him know he has to slow down and enjoy the moment. If he is not a guy willing to do what he has to please his woman then you might need to find a new man. Alot of men get very aroused when they know they are pleasing their lady.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2005
Sat, 02-02-2008 - 12:30pm

My suggestion to you, is to speak with your gynocologist about this problem. This could be either a phyiscal or something down deep inside of you which means you would probably have to speak to a professional about it. I would first start off my making an appointment with your gyno and go from there.


Secondly I would sit down with your boyfriend, and explain to him that this is not his fault. Explain that you feel that this problem is about you and that you are going to look into it, as you love him and want to enjoy having sex with him. Hopefully you will be able to resolve this problem and have a happy and loving relationship with the man you love.


Good luck and please let me know how you are doing. My thoughts are with you.


((((hugs))))

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2008
Sat, 02-02-2008 - 10:26pm
Hopefully you aren't beginning to feel resentful that your guy is only serving himself, but perhaps that is what is going on. Naturally, THAT can get ever-so-tiresome.
What "grades" are you two making in CHEMISTRY? A communication dynamic (TRUST in present and future), and CHEMISTRY seem to have a lot to do with a satisfying sexual life, too. No matter what, the common denominator is: I really have to be truly sexually attracted to the man. Dig?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2008
Sun, 02-03-2008 - 4:38pm

One you need to see a doctor and make sure there is nothing wrong with you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2008
Sun, 02-03-2008 - 10:29pm

I've been there!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Mon, 02-04-2008 - 5:47am

Rubysgirl, I followed a link to your question.


I've been where you are now.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2008
Mon, 02-04-2008 - 1:18pm

From experience, it's okay to let them know that you are not physically into having sex with them.

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