I have a low sex drive, or really no sex drive

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2011
I have a low sex drive, or really no sex drive
37
Fri, 11-11-2011 - 3:22pm

In my 20's I really had no interest in having sex with my husband, it was not about his performance, it was me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2011
Fri, 11-18-2011 - 4:01pm

Thank you for your response, it is appreciated.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2011
Fri, 11-18-2011 - 4:04pm

Thank you for your response.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2009
Sat, 11-19-2011 - 7:42am

Good luck with your painful choice.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2003
Fri, 11-25-2011 - 11:33am
Avatar for holdingontoit
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2004
Fri, 12-02-2011 - 3:43pm
So just tell him the truth. You are not attracted to him sexually. The sex you guys have doesn't do anything for you. You cringe at the thought of doing it with him. But you are willing to tolerate doing it with him every few days if he will continue to pay your bills and provide some security and stability.

Then see if HE wants to stay married.

When you see it coming, duck!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2011
Sat, 12-03-2011 - 7:25pm

Wow, really mixed advice here. One says that duty sex is the worst and the other says to offer to have it regularly even if its unwanted in exchange for having the bills paid.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2009
Sat, 12-03-2011 - 8:05pm
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
Sun, 12-04-2011 - 9:12am

Am I the only one who took Hold's advice as a back-handed way of saying, "Admit the truth to yourself first. Then proceed to put the truth on the table with your spouse."? I didn't read it as, "Duty sex will solve your problem"

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
Sun, 12-04-2011 - 9:49am
>>Am I the only one who took Hold's advice as a back-handed way of saying, "Admit the truth to yourself first. Then proceed to put the truth on the table with your spouse."? I didn't read it as, "Duty sex will solve your problem"<<

I read it with more sarcasm than that, but yeah. Sort of "go ahead and try this, see where it gets you.....good luck with that" sarcasm.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2011
Sun, 12-04-2011 - 10:23pm

I think I need to clarify something and explain who I am as a person.