Is it medical or mental?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2007
Is it medical or mental?
7
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 6:17pm
Im in the same boat as a few. I had some serious health problems but am happy to reportthat I am healthy for the first time in 2 years. I have lost 35 pounds and look better than ever and my marriage is pretty good.
So why am I no longer interested in sex. When we try, I am frustrated and end up angry with the hubby...and it isnt his fault. I have expressed my concerns to the OB/GYN as I changed birth control methods, but she insists my hormone levels are fine
Please help. This is taking a toll on me, my marriage and is now "the elephant in the room."
Avatar for cl_elyse449
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2006
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 6:40pm

Hi jlc,


Welcome!! Glad to have you with us!! This board is truly a treasure.


Congratulations on your health! I do have some questions, though.


1. What were the issues that you faced?


2. Are you on birth control pills?


3.How long have you and your dh been married?


4. How old are you each?


5. Are there any other issues in the marriage?


6. What were your other relationships like?


You mentioned your doctor checked your hormones and they're fine, but did she check anything else? Your thyroid? Anything else?


As far as this being mental, yes I suppose it can be. Also, it may just be who you are as a person and there's no crime in it. Of course if YOU don't feel like this is "normal" than it's possible there's an issue.


Once I hear the answers, I'll know better what ideas to conjure.


Welcome again!!


Elyse




Edited 2/28/2007 6:47 pm ET by cl-elyse449
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2007
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 2:34pm
My heal issues:
over 2 years ago i had my gallblader removed. After a day or so, I became so sick I was admitted for over a week and dutifully played guinea pig. I was given 14 (yes..14!) pregnancy tests (all negative) and sent home. I returned, unconcscious, a day later for an emegency surgery to place a drain in the surgical area. Long sotry short, the surgeon had cut my liver and I was leaking bile into my body cavity. Fastforwad a year and a half ahead (April 06), and I am still not normal and living on coke and crackers. I made a cross contry trip to have a microsurgery to open bile ducts scarred and blocked from the first 2 surgeries.
A year later, I am well! I am 26 years old and married for 3 years. I had been on the pill for years, but my doc doesnt think i digest or absorb medications normally anymore so i switched to the patch. i was recently deemed "pre-diabetic" as a result of the damage to the liver and pancreas but work with a nutrtionist and feel great now.
the marriage is like many. we work a lot, struggle with bills and never seem to keep up on household chores or progects, but all in alll we are ok. the reason i think this is a problem is because, even when i was quite ill, i still had a sex drive. now.....nothin'. when we attempt...i end up feeling angry towards my husband for reasons i dont understand. i am so angry and frustrated with myself and will not accept this as something "normal."
does this help at all?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2006
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 3:41pm

Hi jlc,



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Avatar for cl_elyse449
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2006
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 4:30pm

Wow, jlc!


I'm so sorry for what happened to you. (((HUGS)))

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2007
Sat, 03-03-2007 - 5:04pm

hello again
my liver is as healed as it will get. I have check-ups on the enzyme levels once a month and see the nutritionist once a month as well. when stressed, i derail off the diet a bit and that doesnt help either. i am open with my ob/gyn, but forget any other docs. as you can imagine, i have lost all faith in the majority of medical professionals. for a year, i was told there was nothing wrong with me. and, although i shouldnt be, i am a bit angry and bitter that my entire life, for the rest of my life, has changed because of a "simple surgery." ugh.
back to the subject. im not mad at the hubby for my lack of desire as much as i m just mad that this is happening at all. i am only 26 years old and am healthy and attractive and feel like things should fall into place easier. i am also frustrated FOR the hubby as he feels it is his fault.
to sum. i am just plan MAD.

wow...thanks for the vent.

Avatar for cl_elyse449
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2006
Mon, 03-05-2007 - 3:26pm

jlc,


Why shouldn't you be angry? You went in to have a fairly routine procedure done, and they messed up! I'd be angry to. Granted, surgeons aren't

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2006
Wed, 03-07-2007 - 1:22pm
I think that i would get a 2nd opinion from a different doctor...for sure...before i rested/accepted any kind of conclusion/diagnosis....