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|Tue, 06-30-2009 - 11:22am|
I am the HL and my DH is the LL. We now have a 6 week old together. He has always been LL. Of course I did not know this before we were married. It has been one excuse after another from him. Sex was very rare before baby. Right after I gave birth he asked when we could DTD. Every day he would show me how "excited" he was, he would point out his erection and tell me how badly he wanted it. Everyday it would be the same thing. He was very affectionate as well, lots of hugs and kisses.He was not at all like this before that baby, in fact he was a total %$#@!%*() during my whole pregnancy. I said wow that's great but i think that you only act this way because you can not have it. He insisted that this was not the case. Well now we are able to DTD and guess what? Nothing!! I basically had to get him going and do all of the work, deep kissing which I love and can never get him to do.I hate initiating because of the high rate of being turned down.We DTD once last week, had to use a condom as I was waiting for my birth control to take effect.He claimed he could not ejaculate because of the condom. I helped him finish with my hand. It was great, I told him how much I enjoyed it. I wanted more, it had been so long since we could have sex without the belly in the way, Sex was very rare when I was pregnant too btw). After a few days of my begging we had sex again, no foreplay at all just the way he likes it, but I take what I can get.It was very short , which is ok, and again he did not come. He said we could try again later, I promise. He stayed up late playing video games ( we are both 31 so he's not a kid). I could care less what he does but it feels like he has time for games and not me. So after not having sex that night he passed on the promise to the next morning, and that did not happen either. That night he came to bed and said he wanted to. He said here it is come get it. Wow so thrilled . I said I don't want it.It kills my wanting when i get turned down repeatedly. No affection from him at all. I said he needed to get me in the mood. He gave me one peck of a kiss and thought that was good. I said that if he really wanted it then he could have at least tried to this he did nothing. It would not have been very hard for him to at least put forth some sort of effort. This upset me greatly. He ran away to sleep on the couch. the next day he asked what is wrong and I told him and his answer is to get over it. He does not want to talk about anything ever. He is seeing a therapist. He says he talks about sex with the therapist, so that leaves me in the dark. I said that he teased me for 6 weeks and that he has deeply hurt me and he does not care. I would do anything to make things work and make him happy but the lack of communication effects my ability to do that. Thanks for reading.