My partner and I have mismatched libidos big time!
It's even more fun after 30 years....Just wait and see what it does to your self esteem. Fix it or leave..Better pain that hurts bad now instead of the long term corrosion of your self-worth....with the occassional nuggets of soul searing agony.
Think of something you enjoy doing occasionally, perhaps even regularly, but not every day -- maybe it's gardening, going to a museum or swimming in a lake. Now imagine your boyfriend keeps pestering you about it: Why don't you want to garden with me? Don't you love me? It's been two whole days, etc. How would that make you feel, after weeks and months of it? Try to accept that your boyfriend feels this way about sex.
crustyglitter wrote:My partner and I have mismatched libidos big time!
....I think you should read, read, read...educate yourself a little...stop thinking in blanket terms "why do MEN get this way over time?"...it has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with the individual...by the way...another poster has some good suggestions...my husband prefers to have sex 2 times a day, 7 days a week...I am good with (sexually satisfied) 3-4 times a week...we've compromised at once a day...he's on the losing end with a bigger compromise, but he seems (tells me) satisfied and not left feeling ignored or starved...I think it's great that you are open to having him engage with you a few times a week with activity other than intercourse, but I would caution you to enjoy it for what it is (his enthusiastic participation...if he does, indeed, enthusiastically participate) and not as a possible way to add some zip to his libido...
>>Him pleasing me with a vibrator or his hand may also get him in the mood for more! Great idea!<<
Or it could make him feel little better than a sex slave.
However, if I'm not in the mood I couldn't think of anything less appealing than being asked to service him
I think that reflects your attitude to it rather than what it could be.
..I think it's all in the attitude...you "service" your man, I please mine...same act, different attitude...