decided not to hijack, what "counts as initiation

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
decided not to hijack, what "counts as initiation
43
Mon, 11-15-2010 - 8:59am

The "Oprah" discussion has wandered far afield from the original topic, but it has me back to wondering the same thing I always wonder.

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2010

To me intimate physical contact is any touch that would not be appropriate between you and anyone but your partner.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
I think your idea to "mimic" has a lot of merit. Unfortunately, my DH does not get it when I "grope" on him the way he does on me, and I cannot subject him to the "penis poke" as I don't have one, lol.....

I generally feel like curling up to him naked, and rubbing his back and butt should give him a clue, but alas, he's apparently dimwitted
Avatar for holdingontoit
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2004
I am thinking maybe it is possible to get a ring tone of Pepe LePew singing "I'm in the mood for love". Mel Blanc does a mean Maurice Chevalier impersonation. It is campy enough that it isn't too serious, but it is explicit enough that even a dimwitted partner can't miss the point.

When you see it coming, duck!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
lol, that's funny. Unfortunately, I am pretty much only initiating because I am trying to "jump through the hoops" I'm not really "in the mood for love" But I'd do it anyway, if I thought it would work. The more I think about this, the more I realize that the only thing that is going to "work" is to return to how it was when we were first together, and even that won't actually work, because he's always going to see it through the filter of where we are now.

I'm fighting a losing battle. I'm just too stupid to pull a full scale retreat.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2009

...I'm not into subtlety...hahahahahahahaaa....but, anyway...if my husband wants to have sex, he needs to say so...I mean, at other time than our scheduled sex time...being flirty or using codes or certain gestures don't work for me...just say it....so, the one that says "hey baby, wanna eff you cee kay" first gets the credit for initiation...

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2010

DW is so subtle I truly can't tell it is initiation.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
mirandarr8 wrote:

I've asked him on weekends if he was going to "get back in bed?"

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2006

My first big conflict with my stbxw was over her

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
>>BTW, by willingness I mean any personal/intrinsic motivation, not just raw sexual desire.<<

The only motivation I really have for the most part is to provide him with what he wants. To get it right for a freaking change. I just want to know what I have to do for it to "count" and for him to stop criticizing me.

I am guessing that would not be an appropriate motivation.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2010

>>...

Pages