He's okay with LL !!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2011
He's okay with LL !!
4
Sat, 07-16-2011 - 3:22pm

We have been dating for 5 years now.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2004
Sat, 07-16-2011 - 8:49pm
Maybe he chose to keep the same medication because he knows that's not why he's not interested in sex anymore. Does he masturbate? Does he have problems with ED? How is your relationship otherwise?
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2011
Sat, 07-16-2011 - 10:39pm
I dont realy know if he masturbates or not, don't think so. Didnt have problems with ED before, like I said we have only had sex 3 times in the last year.I am about done. We have a great relationshiip, if we were brother and sister. Missing the intimacy is missing a big part of it, don't you think?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2009
Sun, 07-17-2011 - 7:24am

...ask him specifically why he isn't interested in pursuing other forms of medicine...by the way, why is his blood pressure up?...diet? weight? family history?...I would also spell out exactly what you believe that you need in a relationship to feel emotionally/romantically connected and sexually satisfied...be concrete...don't use slang terms such as "I need more nookie" or "I need to get it on"....don't use vague terms such as "I need to feel connected to you"...use concrete languages....offer some compromise situations, such as one week the two of you engage in sexual play to the extent that you want and he enthusiastically participates even if it means no intercourse and more of a hands/tongue on approach for him along with the use of toys...then, the next week, he has all of the sex that he wants and you enthusiastically participate...even if his "all he wants" means none at all...how he responds to your concrete questions about his health, your needs, and possible compromises will tell you all you need to know about the future of your relationship and then...you'll have some decisions and choices to consider...

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
Sun, 07-17-2011 - 7:48pm
zejayge wrote:

....offer some compromise situations, such as one week the two of you engage in sexual play to the extent that you want and he enthusiastically participates even if it means no intercourse and more of a hands/tongue on approach for him along with the use of toys...

I agree with this post completely. I would like to add: I think you need to be even more concrete. If you're offering the kind of compromise described above and it's "your week", what are your expectations of him included in "sexual play"?