hey miranda......I have a dumb question

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2007
hey miranda......I have a dumb question
30
Wed, 01-26-2011 - 2:24pm

I feel like everytime I open my mouth I show how naive I am, but.....I have a question.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
Wed, 01-26-2011 - 2:35pm

>>....I feel like everytime I open my mouth I show how naive I am, but.....I have a question. LOL

I was reading a bunch of threads, catching up and I saw a post you made about condoms and about how your husband hates them and refuses to wear them......well how does one go about having safe sex with others if he wont wear one? Does he wear them with other women, just not with you? If so, considering that he really hates them, how do you know that he sometimes just doesnt wear them? I mean I know you chose to trust him, but he seems to be very stubborn about getting his own way on most things. anyway, just me wondering from my own little prudish world! <<

Yes, he wears them with other women and not with me. Yes, I trust him on this. He knows very well that if he endangers my life to get his rocks off I will CUT HIS PACKAGE OFF! I am not overstating, I am not kidding, I am not playing. We've had so much discussion about this, you wouldn't believe it. I spent a lot of years in the gay community and have people who I consider family die from AIDS. He wouldn't dare, no matter how much he wants his own way, endanger me that way. And just in case we go 2x a year for HIV tests, just because everybody should. Nothing is 100% no matter how much we want it to be. We do it more to make a statement to the kids, and to everyone we know that you just HAVE to get tested. The people at public health think we are the cutest thing they've ever seen. They love us! LOL, we spread the word!

Hope that answers it for you, and your question was actually quite smart, not dumb at all.

ETA:

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2006
Wed, 01-26-2011 - 3:19pm

Hi Miranda... I thought you might get a kick out of this.

Man Seeks Protection From Sex-Crazed Wife in Germany

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2007
Wed, 01-26-2011 - 3:24pm

that would still seriously freak me out.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
Wed, 01-26-2011 - 3:28pm
>>My dear, YOU are sleeping with a man you are not in a monogamous relationship with, without a condom. <<

LOL, I edited to add that in a hurry without thinking about it, but I will own it, I'm an idiot.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
Wed, 01-26-2011 - 3:29pm
>>German police said the exhausted man -- who fathered two children with his wife -- decided to get a divorce and move out of the home.<<

It sounds ridiculous, but I think I totally understand how he feels. That would be exhausted.....lol
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2006
Wed, 01-26-2011 - 3:30pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2007
Wed, 01-26-2011 - 3:31pm
sorry, it just cracked me up!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
Wed, 01-26-2011 - 3:34pm
>>Does that ever get weird for you or them?<<

I think it might be for some of them, but I really don't care about that. It's not weird to me at all. I would interview a dog sitter, why not this? I'm not asking specific sex questions or anything, just letting them know I'm involved in this too, and that it's okay with me within the confines of our limits, etc
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2006
Wed, 01-26-2011 - 3:38pm

One would think that, if he was decent in bed,

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
Wed, 01-26-2011 - 3:53pm
>>One would think that, if he was decent in bed, he could land a long-term FWB or affair partner and not have to replace these women regularly, no?<<

It was our hope that what you describe would be what happened, but as of yet, he has found no such person. It's amazing how difficult it is to find a woman who is willing to have sex with someone who isn't offering anything else. Of course we also live in a small town type of area, and neither of us wants him having to drive 3 hours to a booty call several times per week. Also we will not consider anyone who has a life partner that they are lying to.

And then of course there are his personality problems and the fact that he is overweight and a smoker, but isn't interested in a BBW.

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