Ideas for "milder" ML cases ;O)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2010
Ideas for "milder" ML cases ;O)
7
Mon, 08-02-2010 - 8:14am

Has anyone done anything that worked to spice up their sex life, such as create a mood in their bedrooms?




Edited 8/12/2010 2:52 am ET by coconut2010
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
Mon, 08-02-2010 - 8:40am

I can tell you what would work for redecorating my bedroom, but it might not apply for everyone. A hot man I don't already know. THAT would work. Or...the ex I had an extremely hot dream about last night.....funny thing, I don't think we even had sex in the dream, or at least I don't remember that...we were making out, but I woke up with my heart hammering anyways!

Seriously, room decor doesn't matter if you're hot for the other person in the room.

roo and snowy siggie
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2010
Mon, 08-02-2010 - 8:56am

Have you ever done anything that caused you to "get it back"

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2009
Mon, 08-02-2010 - 9:15am
...we have made our bedroom an "out of bounds" area from the real world...all of my husband's stuff(electronic geek "smart" guy stuff) is in his office downstairs...no pictures of children or anyone else for that matter except for a large one of "us"...we do have a television for those occasional, snowy evenings when we are alone and want to watch a movie or 10 in bed....and, we actually have a "knock first and wait for acknowledgment before entering rule"...but, the best thing about my room is that it's on the other side of the house from the children and, when I walk down the hall, there is a little built in extra hall that makes my room feel even further away...and, the bathroom and walkin closet are on either side of the entrance...then the bedroom is toward the back...
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2010
Mon, 08-02-2010 - 9:35am

Must be nice to have your bedroom away from the rest of the house.




Edited 8/4/2010 5:23 am ET by coconut2010
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
Mon, 08-02-2010 - 9:51am

>> I don't know much of your story, wondering if you've tried these kind of things or just think there's no point? That's one huge problem, when you're not interested you're "not interested" so maybe don't feel like trying. Kind of a no-win. <<

We've got the drawer full of sex toys (actually half a cedar chest full as well) the movies, no pictures in the bedroom, etc. It doesn't make any difference.

>>Have you ever "gotten it back" with your guy for any length of time? Also I'm not talking about decor, but creating a sexualized atmosphere, everything from candles and music to all kinds of erotic aids nearby. What does your bedroom look like?<<

No, I've never "gotten it back" with ANY guy for any length of time. Once I know them and the initial chemistry wears off, it's gone. We've tried the candles and music, etc etc. Our bedroom looks like a bedroom, like I said above. It's all very nice and whatever, but I'm just not one of those people who can keep the fires burning once familiarity sets in. I can "go through the motions" but that is about it.

roo and snowy siggie
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Registered: 04-10-2010
Mon, 08-02-2010 - 9:56am
Would you say
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2006
Mon, 08-02-2010 - 10:07am

>>So you stay because you like him as a person and consider him your family, even though you're not attracted to him?<<

I stay with him because I love him. Love and sex are not mutually entwined for me, and never really have been. I actually like sex better with someone I do not love. Love sort of ruins it for me.

>>Also, if it's not too personal, do you think your sex drive is always dependent on the other person. In other words, do you ever just want to do it with him because you're in the mood for *it*, aside from however attracted you are to him or whoever?<<

If there is not attraction to amp it up, I rarely ever notice any sex drive at all. I might feel the urge to masturbate occasionally (maybe once or twice a month) but that is more like when you can feel a sneeze building in your head. I feel the pressure, I need to sneeze (orgasm) I masturbate, it's over, I move on.

There's no "excitement" attached to it, and no desire to interact with anybody else, just get the job done, and move on.

roo and snowy siggie