Many good points and very little to argue with. Your description of having to get into your partner's brain and do your level best to understand an alien mindset is most valuable.
One thing you didn't address is initiation. In your view, do you think it's reasonable for the person who wants sex more to initiate more, or do you think the LL also has a duty (to the relationship) to do a fair share of initiating? I think this is one of the stumbling blocks for LLs: the idea that, on top of engaging in sex without desire, they're called to initiate sex when not in the mood (and play-act more enjoyment than actually felt).
I understand the mirror-image issue for HLs: the abject dread of initiating and then getting shot down. Still, I'd be interested in your response to my question.
Don't really see much math in the posts.
When you see it coming, duck!
very little to argue with - ah, well, I've been learning from some smart people.....
I did spend some time thinking about building a really detailed
I'd have loved to do some diagrams because they're much more informative and intuitive than words - regrettably the forum doesn't support image embeds.
I agree it is dismal when there is no frequency which produces a net positive for the couple.