Well, It's Decided

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2006
Well, It's Decided
20
Sun, 05-09-2010 - 7:47pm

The wife and I are going to part company as soon as the youngest is off to college in September. 25 years we've been together, both for the good and for the bad, which is pretty much ML.


For the most part, I'm very comfortable with the decision, with a number of significant exceptions/issues:


I worry about her.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2009
Sun, 05-09-2010 - 8:53pm
...what?...you sound good to me...something must be wrong...?...you're a republican?...seriously...I don't think anything you strive for is too out there...you sound like my husband...you sound wonderful...I'm afraid that I don't think there are any tried and true ways to test a potential partner...I think the trick may be getting yourself out of a relationship when you see there's a problem without minimizing or sweeping concerns under your own mental rug...
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2007
Sun, 05-09-2010 - 9:33pm
I read over your list, seems pretty "normal" meaning average, middle of the road.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2006
Sun, 05-09-2010 - 10:11pm

"I worry about her.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2009
Sun, 05-09-2010 - 11:16pm

Just wondering...does your wife know her marriage is ending in four months, after 25 years together?


You say it's decided. Have you informed her?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2006
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 6:31am

Thanks for your comments, folks.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2009
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 5:50pm
I am a woman who does not think you are asking too much! Some woman will be lucky to find you!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2010
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 6:09pm
I'm 50 and finding my libido is higher than when I was 25. I like the freedom of not having kids around any longer. I have absolutely loved being 50 and am looking forward to more freedoms. Your expectations seem about average to me although I like a little more sexual adventure than you have described. I think those of us approaching our 50s and beyond want to find some fun. We have put in the work. It is now time to vacation.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2009
Mon, 05-10-2010 - 9:23pm
Completely reasonable, and might I add, necessary, for what most HLs need for a successful relationship. I would only suggest that you do not take the first one that comes along. It might take some time, but if you have something to give, I believe there is someone out there ready to receive. Don't give up til you find her. As you have already found, less than what you need just doesn't work.
***Self Proclaimed Diva***
If you can't accept me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2009
Tue, 05-11-2010 - 6:26am

Good luck, and remember to take an inventory of the Top 10 ways to spot an LL!


I'm feeling that currently you're (quite understandably) focussed on achieving sexual compatibility as the primary thing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-29-2007
Tue, 05-11-2010 - 9:29am

Wow, best of luck to you both. It sounds like you're both approaching it as well as possible.


Just don't be one of "those divorced guys" who jumps back to the alter w/ the first gril that comes along.

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