From The Mouth of Babes

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2004
From The Mouth of Babes
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Tue, 06-14-2011 - 10:41pm

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2010
Tue, 06-14-2011 - 11:34pm
I'm going to respond with a "shame on the parents" and I'm including myself in that scolding since I recently became aware of how negative things can get for a kid when parents aren't supervising their kids and talking to them about what they're posting and viewing. We can't control what's on the internet but we can at least parent our kids. why aren't cristal's parents on facebook checking in with her? when my gf's kids got on facebook she made and account and insisted on being on their friends list, especially when her 13 year old daughter got on facebook. she sits down with her kids and checks out what they're watching on tv and has boundaries on what video games are allowed in her home. in short she takes time to be a parent. on the flip side, i just discovered that no matter how well grounded a kid seems it's a good idea to check in and not assume anything. yes, kids can get some crazy ideas from the things they "learn" on the internet and i realise the popular train of thought is that checking up on our kids is an invasion of privacy. I beg to differ. it's called parenting. i didn't get the priveledge of privacy until i was an adult and as indignant as i got sometimes at least my mom cared enough to pay attention to how i turned out.
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Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
Wed, 06-15-2011 - 2:48am

Well I guess that sex education is really missing.

dragowoman

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Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
Wed, 06-15-2011 - 10:08am

I am of the opinion that parents are not the best source when it comes to sex education.

dragowoman

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2010
Wed, 06-15-2011 - 12:38pm

thanks for the response. I apprciate your candor. I found the last paragraph very informative. :smileyhappy:

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2004
Wed, 06-15-2011 - 2:35pm

Cleary parents have a responsiblity to talk to their children about sex. How many parents have continued talks about sex, especially porn?

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Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
Wed, 06-15-2011 - 2:55pm

i've watched how my gf parents her kids and her kids aren't afraid to talk to her about anything. her youngest son just flew out to another state to see his girlfriend. she talked to him upfront about safe sex and responsibility and asked him straight out if he had condoms

dragowoman

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2004
Wed, 06-15-2011 - 3:00pm

In today's culture, conversations about sex need to be more then just about condoms and stds. These are the basics and things kids should know but parents need to be having conversations about the many different and sometimes confusing messages they will get from adult content, how they feel about their own bodies, how they fell emotionally..and so on. And it needs to be a continued conversation. it can be a one time "oh you're having your first sleep over with your gf/bg..well here are the condoms son/daughter, don't make any babies. Have a good time." Kids are exposed to twice the graphic images that previous generatons have been. Yes we all know parents hsould do a better job..blah blah blah..doesn't stop the fact that boys start developing a relationship with porn as young as 11, maybe even younger in today's tech world.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2010
Fri, 06-17-2011 - 12:10am

Cleary parents have a responsiblity to talk to their children about sex. How many parents have continued talks about sex, especially porn? Instead of the obligatory, this is where babies come from, don't get any STDs. I bet most don't. You also have to factor in that the internet wasn't around or nearly as invasive as when today's parents where teenagers. So they probably tend to think "oh, not *my* kid".."*my* son would never treat a girl like that.."*my* daughter would never post a picture of her body for validation".

Well talking to a kid about specifics can be pretty dicey business. i had the "birds and the bees" talk with my son when he turned 11 but haven't had the occasion to discuss things like dating and how to treat girls mostly because he's chosen to focus on academics and basketball and considered girls and dating to be a distraction much to the disappointment of many girls

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Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
Fri, 06-17-2011 - 2:22am

Yes It is very difficult to explain.

dragowoman

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2010
Fri, 06-17-2011 - 11:44am

Déjà vu! When I went to the dorms my mother had paced a big box of condoms on top! She had worked in STD research.

your mom sounds like a smart cookie. my gf's boys got the full discussion. she taught them how to put them on correctly(using a banana lol). her youngest son was the result of faulty condom application and she wanted to make sure that her boys weren't flying blind.

Then the question of what is "healthy". By whose standered?

DING! Give the man a klondike bar! you just asked the million dollar question lol. What's "healthy"? well people could sit around arguing about that all day couldn't they? i can only give my definition of healthy

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