Breaking up The right way

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2003
Breaking up The right way
Mon, 06-23-2003 - 3:41pm
Hey guys...well I finally have accepted that I have to let my GF of 4 years move on. It just got to the point where she felt smothered by our relationship and she wants to be 20 instead of feeling married and in prison.

We started going out at 16 and have been together for 4 years....Mostly great memories and of course problems here and there. She has basically told me she feels like she fell out of love with me and wants to date other people. She hid a lot of stuff from me and we never got a chance to address the issues that caused problems in our relationship. Because of this I was desparately trying to hold on and continued to ask for a second chance. She just wont give in so I have no choice but to give her up. The thing is is that she sees a future with us...Deep down I know she loves me. I know she will miss our good times and memories and I know at times it will be tough to be apart from me. She still gets jealous when girls call me..which I dont understand..but anyways. These last couple weeks we have together is basically me saying goodbye for now. I believe that down the road..however long that will be...we will be together again.

My question is how should I handle this time so she looks at it and says "Maybe we should try again"..... I just want this time to be special and for her to never forget it...


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 06-23-2003 - 6:26pm
Well, ironically, when a person says they're feeling trapped and smothered, desperately hanging on and asking for second chances just drives them further away. The only chance you have of salvaging the relationship is by letting her go. What I would suggest is that you go to the library and check out a book called "Love Must Be Tough" and read it. That book has great advice for someone in your situation.