Dealing with Grief?
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|Fri, 09-16-2011 - 3:21pm|
My boyfriend's Mom died almost 2 months ago. Since then, there have been some things happening that I'm curious to know whether it's a manifestation of his grief, because they were very uncharacteristic for him.
This past week, he had told me he recently started talking to his ex-gf, just through facebook messages regarding an investigation by the state department. That's a whole long story in and of itself, but basically, he had to be interviewed by some agents in regards to her situation with her ex-husband and their kid. So, he said she contacted him asking about it and just some general questions about it. Well, Wednesday night he told me she had texted him earlier in the day about how she thought some federal agent was sitting outside where she works, and it turned out to be her client. He did tell me they were talking and I told him it made me uncomfortable. After we talked for a little, I went to bed and he said he'd be right up. I went down there about an hour later and he was sound asleep. I woke him up, and he at that point asked me to take his phone upstairs and plug it in, while he took the dogs out. I agreed to, and UGH, I hate saying this...but I looked at the text messages between the two of them. They had been talking since Tuesday night...and all throughout the day Wednesday, even past the time he told me he'd be right up to bed. He barely answered any of my text messages at all that same day, and I chalked it up to him being busy. But, he certainly had time to text her back and forth. And the next before while I was sleeping in bed right next to him.There were two text messages that seriously concerned me. One was mentioning how she'd have to do a lot to ever earn his trust back...and one was concerning the journal his Mom kept...saying that she know how much he loves her because it was written in her journal. Mind you, the journal is over a year old. But, it's the wording of that text that bothers me so much. Although, in another text he said he had loved her so much, it took him a while to get past her leaving.
He did catch me going through his phone, and was absolutely furious with me (understandably so...). He finally calmed down and talked to me, telling me how upset he was that I went through his phone. I apologized and told him that I had felt like he was hiding something.