dh on the verge of a breakdown

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2010
dh on the verge of a breakdown
6
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 11:47am

My dh is very depressed.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 12:46pm

Unfortunately... And very sadly... You cannot help someone who refuses help. I hope you can talk to his Dr and tell him/her in confidence that he is not taking the medication.

You say that you are afraid for your husband - Is there any part of you that is afraid OF him?

Does he threaten to do anything to you or himself? Can you explain how he is on the verge of a breakdown?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2008
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 1:17pm
Is the marriage counselor experienced in treating people for depression and has there been any discussion of individual therapy?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2002
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 3:38pm

there are holistic approaches to treating depression. Im kind of with your DH on this one, there are some pretty funky side effects that go along with medication.

With that said. Do you think he would be open to looking at natural treatments.

Diet wise. There is a link between sugar and depression. The same goes for caffeine. There are studies that show that sugar consumption is linked to the blues.

Exercise is also a great mood booster. Would a gym membership open up an opportunity for him to not only exercise but get some time for himself to unwind? I know with my DH there is a very significant difference in his mood, in direct relationship with working out. A long run does wonders for him.

It maybe time for him to look into individual therapy as well.

Essentially, this is all on him. He needs to be the one to want to feel better and be willing to do what it takes to achieve that. But you could at least suggest these alternatives if you haven't already.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 6:58pm
Specifically what side effects is he afraid of? My ex had bipolar disorder & he was on a whole cocktail of different meds because his particular disease was kind of resistant to meds. He did have some side effects w/ certain meds, and then he went off them, but the ones he stayed on either didn't have side effects or they weren't that bad compared to being off the meds. He literally could not function w/o them. At one point he tried homeopathy but he didn't stick w/ it too long--your DH might try that, I'm not totally sure how it works. For very mild cases, St. John's Wort might work, but that was not enough for my ex cause his case was severe. He also tried hypnosis. But just doing nothing is not going to help. There is a book at major bookstores called something like When your Loved One is Depressed. I found that pretty helpful.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2010
Tue, 09-28-2010 - 10:05pm

I think that depression clouds the thinking. I doubt his meds will have any worse side effects than what he's headed for without them. I guess you could talk to his doctor. Good luck.






Edited 10/3/2010 12:03 am ET by darling.carly
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 09-29-2010 - 3:21am
Welcome to the board, Ajayceegirl, I'm so sorry you're going through this ~

I think it's important that you contact your therapist and report that he's flushed his medication and that you fear he's on the edge of a complete mental breakdown. S/he will be able to offer you sound advice as to what to do, perhaps now, but certainly if you see that he is indeed in serious trouble. S/he will also be able to tell you what to look for as indicators that he is indeed in need of immediate care and how to get that for him.

I would also suggest posting on two boards on the iVillage Health Channel:

Families & Mental Illness
Depression Support

Do not forget that your local emergency room is a good place to call if you're concerned or unsure whether immediate help is needed. ER staff is well versed in dealing with emotional issues and will help you determine the needs of the moment.

Huge hugs. Please keep us updated on how things are going.















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"Ignoring the facts
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