DH wants to move,I thinks its a bad idea

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2002
DH wants to move,I thinks its a bad idea
8
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 6:27pm

We live in NY and have jobs,not fantastic ones but they pay bills.My DH wants to get out due to the high cost of living which I agree and understand.However,I find it very unrealistic to move to a new area WITHOUT definate jobs and any family or friends which we don't have around here either but would be even further away from them.He is 52 and

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 9:44pm

Does he actually know how to run a farm?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 11:37pm
And how does he intend on buying a farm? Since " you don't have fantastic jobs now", have you any money put aside for a down payment on a farm? And has he ever ran a farm before? As music said, it's hard work to run a farm. It's not something you just jump into without any farming experience. As you said I can see relocating for a good job offer. But you can't just up and move with no steady income coming in, unless maybe you have enough savings put aside to live off of for quite a while until you do find steady work.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 11:40pm

A farm???

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2002
Wed, 04-25-2012 - 11:34am

Thank you everyone. These are exactly the kind of responses I expected to receive.We have a house that we did a re-fi on once and therefore still owe money on so we wouldn't have much of a down payment due to the market these day,plus we have 23,000 in credit card debt and no savings.I wish I could lock him up in a room with Suzi Orman!I thinks hes hellbent on doing it so I probably will end up divorced down the road.I am a Bartender/Waitress and I could more than likely find work anywhere but still,I think I would get stuck and not a chance worth taking!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Thu, 04-26-2012 - 11:08am

I also think you might want to consult a lawyer about filing for bankruptcy to get rid of that debt.

Community Leader
Registered: 01-03-2004
Fri, 04-27-2012 - 1:26pm

Hi,

The others here make a good point. "Running away' to a "farm." Sounds like an escape plan. He's running away from his responsibilities.

Sure it's costly to live in NY.

My advice is this: Get yourselves enrolled in Dave Ramsey. Lots of churches offer the class. It'll cost you a $100. Believe me, it will be money well spent. It's the single most common sense, funny, practical, in-your-face financial program out there. Make this a condition of doing anything further. He'll have to give it 12 weeks, but that's OK.

Dave Ramsey goes over all the stuff you're talking about: credit card debt, "stupid" decisions, and other things. Trust me. It works. We paid off $27K in credit card debt in 18 months after going through the program. We're about to pay off $25K on our mortgage.

Don't run away or file for divorce. Run to DaveRamsey.com.

Community Leader
Registered: 01-03-2004
Fri, 04-27-2012 - 1:30pm
P.S. I'd suggest your husband take a part-time job or volunteer at a local farm in the NY countryside. There's lots going on this time of year - tilling, planting, etc. It would give him a real world view of what it's like to "farm" especially on a small scale. It might do him some good to get out and find out what he's really asking to get into.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2002
Sat, 04-28-2012 - 2:28pm

Thanks I'll look into that program and on a side note we do have a garden and 6 chickens but I am well aware that doesn't compare to the size of