ex's and their stupid dogs

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
ex's and their stupid dogs
14
Thu, 09-28-2006 - 4:57pm
What is peoples prespective on dog custody??? My fiance has been divorced for a 2 yrs and we have been together 1.5 yrs and his ex just started taking the dog when she doesn't work on the weekends. I am sorry but if you can be with someone 10 yrs married for 1 and get divorced you can let go of the dog. My daughter gets upset when the dog leaves. I can see if the dog were older and whatever. Seriously I think this is retarded. I also hate that it bothers me so much but really move on get your own dog!!!!!!!1

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-31-2004
Sat, 09-30-2006 - 12:46pm
the answer is to tell the ex to take the dog permanently and buy the child her own dog who no one can take from her, since the ex 'loooooves' her dog so much. I think CL-2nd life is more on point--that the ex is using the dog to stir up problems in his relationship; the fall out is the child is being impacted--and being a mother myself, I can't countenence anyone thinking it's ok to act in a way which is willfully hurting an innocent child. She needs to take her dog and go. The child doesn't have the maturity to navigate this situation which this ex should possess by now in her life.
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 09-30-2006 - 1:06pm

How do you KNOW she's "willfully" trying to hurt the child? I think that's a whole lot of conjecture and projection. Maybe she really just wants to spend time with the dog she loves.

A dog is not fungible--getting another one doesn't solve anything. The ex "taking the dog and going" doesn't help the child, IMO, and what about the OP's fiance? He's probably attached to the dog as well!

I simply don't agree that a child can't learn to deal with the dog being gone for a couple days at a time, especially if her Mom doesn't make a federal case of it and helps her understand that Fluffy's going to stay with her other mommy and will be back in a few days.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 10-01-2006 - 10:20pm
It's also possible that the child isn't all that upset by the dog's leaving at all, it could be an easy issue to focus on for her mom in order to voice her objection to this situation without having to be honest with her boyfriend about what her real issue is. Sheri, I'm glad you brought up the point about a child being able to adapt to a dog leaving for the weekend, you're right, That hadn't even occurred to me. But, without Kboynton coming back and telling us, we really don't know what the situation is.








~ cl-2nd_life

"Experience is what you get
when you don't get what you want."

~ Author unknown



Edited 10/1/2006 10:25 pm ET by cl-2nd_life








"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 10-01-2006 - 10:24pm
Kboynton, I want to be sure you know that the dialogue that's gone on regarding the possibilities in your situation are not judging you, it's simply speculation on what could be. Until you come back and give us more information, we won't know. I hope you'll come back, there are things we can suggest, but without knowing the extent of your issue, we aren't able to.










~ cl-2nd_life

"Experience is what you get
when you don't get what you want."

~ Author unknown








"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"

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