Final piece of the puzzle

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2005
Final piece of the puzzle
11
Thu, 10-27-2005 - 1:12pm
I have been dating a man for the past 14 months. He has had a rocky history in his past relationships. He married when he was 21 and within 3 weeks found his new wife (whom he had dated for several years) in bed with another man. The marriage ended 3 months after it began. A few years later a one night stand resulted in a pregnancy and with the prodding of his mother he married the mother of the baby. He did not love her, but stayed together with her for 5 years and had another child. They grew to hate each other and divorced. He then met an married another woman. This one he really loved, however she was a very manipulative, controlling person who wanted things her way or the highway. After years of fighting...her moving in and moving out several times and her children as well as his children wanting the break up so the fighting would stop... she moved out again and the divorce followed 3 months later.
That's where I come in. After dating for four months, he presented me with a ring. It is an engagement ring with a wedding band also. He said the ring was a promise ring that showed me that he would always be with me. He said we would marry eventually. I moved in with him 4 months after that which was April this year. He has mentioned marriage a few times, but no proposal.
He told me that all the pieces of the puzzle would all come together during a camping trip we had planned since May. That trip has come and gone with the puzzle still incomplete.
Our friends call me his wife... he has spoken to others and called me his wife... but I am still not Mrs. _________. There are other things that make me wonder what he is thinking, but they are too many to mention here.
I realize his past has hurt him but how long should I wait before I talk to him about it. I am not one for ultimatums, but I do not want to just live together forever.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 10-31-2005 - 9:07pm

Good luck! Let us know how it goes.







~ cl-2nd_life

"You can't control the length of your life,
but you can control the width and depth."

~ Author unknown

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