Gift issues and hurt feelings
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|Sun, 12-27-2009 - 4:18pm|
I'd like your honest assessment here. I am wondering if I am being petty or whining.
We've been married for about 6 months and I learned that I would have an early pregnancy miscarriage about a week before Christmas. We hadn't announced the pregnancy to family and decided to wait until the second trimester to see if it was a keeper.
None the less, I opened a host of oversized and maternity clothes from my husband in front of his family yesterday. I was very hurt that my DH didn't take the maternity and XXL things out of the Christmas pile. (I'm a medium sized person)
He asks for extravagant things for birthdays and Holidays and I always get him the top of the line in what he asks for, this year a $600 tool for his work shop. We buy practical gifts because we have a small apartment.
I asked for a few nice things that would cost less that $50 each, and he gets the cheapest versions that he can find that don't have the features I require, so I have to take them back and get things that will work. I do tell him in advance the details about what I need and in a written list at his request.
If I get myself things that I need, he becomes angry because I am not leaving anything for him to get me.
He's pouting now, because he is taking the maternity clothes back, so I have some space to my self and can write this.
I feel like a real complainer and feel very guilty.
I am thinking of suggesting that we limit gifts to $20 or something next year so the issues don't come up. Do you think that might be a good Idea?
Am I expecting too much of him? Should I keep the things that won't work and buy things that will, too, so he doesn't feel bad?
Thanks kindly for your honest appraisal.