HELP ...I WANT MY HUSBAND TO LEAVE!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2006
HELP ...I WANT MY HUSBAND TO LEAVE!!
16
Sat, 09-16-2006 - 6:52am
Help! I just don't know what to do! My husband has been verbally abusive since before the marriage (2years ago) and slightly physically abusive. He now complains that I am attacking him and "HURTING" and Absuing him becuase I am finally telling him how much he has crushed me. My husband used to have a great paying job that he hated but he has decided to go back to school for a graduate degree so we have moved in with my parents who have been really nice. We have savings. I don't have a job but I am looking but I have no place to go. But I have asking him DAILY for the past 3 weeks to leave. He won't leave. I want him to leave. What can I do?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-31-2004
Sat, 09-16-2006 - 7:25am

1.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2006
Sat, 09-16-2006 - 8:08am
Scarily I very soon to be an attorney!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2006
Sat, 09-16-2006 - 8:13am
Also, while I wait for my exam results to find out if I am an attorney...I am going out today to try to find a job!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Sat, 09-16-2006 - 6:32pm

Are your parents in agreement that he should leave?

If so, when he's out, pack his bags and put them out the front. And have the locks changed. Call the police (have him arrested) if he tries to break in. If he never goes out, have the police escort him from the house.

This is not his house and he has absolutely no rights to stay there against your parents will.

Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2006
Sat, 09-16-2006 - 8:11pm
my parents think he's great becuase I never complain! I don't think they will even beleive me!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 09-16-2006 - 10:10pm
What does "slightly physcially abusive" mean? What exactly has he done?




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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-31-2004
Sun, 09-17-2006 - 7:03am

Then you need to tell them!!!!!


as I wrote above: "3.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Sun, 09-17-2006 - 6:07pm
So tell your parents. If they don't believe you, then find a friend to go stay with or look for an organization that helps women who have been abused. That should also ensure that he's thrown out whether or not your parents believe you since it's unlikely they would keep letting him stay there for free if you've left him.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 09-18-2006 - 12:37am
Welcome to the board, Distressedlady ~


I would urge you to contact your local women's shelter for temporary residence. I'm sure I don't have to tell you that contacting an attorney who is well versed in domestic violence for advice on how to appropriately proceed is the best thing to do, laws vary from state to state and court tolerance varies from city to city and from judge to judge; and attorney who comes recommended in DV will know the ins and outs in your area. A website that may be very helpful to you is Womenslaw.org


I would also strongly urge you to post on the Dealing With Domestic Abuse board. They are in or have been in situations just like yours. Ask them questions, they'll be happy to offer you advice, suggestions and encouragement. Read the posts that are there, both current and archived ones, there's a lot of inspiration and knowledge there. Also read the Domestic Abuse Board's Homepage , it's filled with articles and information that will be very insightful to you. It's there that I first realized my ex had been verbally abusive. Even read the articles that don't seem to pertain to your situation, you'd be surprised how many places you'll find your husband's behavior fitting into and you'll learn a lot about the dynamics of verbal abuse and abuse in general.








~ cl-2nd_life

"Experience is what you get
when you don't get what you want."

~ Author unknown



Edited 9/18/2006 2:47 am ET by cl-2nd_life








"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2006
Mon, 09-18-2006 - 3:35am
I just don't think my parents would be supportive ....they never have been supportive towards the "good" decisions I have made ...much less something they probably would think wouldn't be a problem!

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