help..i'm really depressed

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2003
help..i'm really depressed
Sun, 05-18-2003 - 3:14am
My name is maria, and i'm 20 years old..and i live with my boyfriend. i'm really depressed about my relatioship..because my boyfriend doesnt talk to me, some times he doesnt even say hi when he comes home, everytime i say something he tell me that i'm always wrong and he gets mad at me. He talks to me everytime he is angry, or when he needs a favor..i dont know what to do.. i already left 2 times from the house...but i dont know if i'll leave the third time. I dont feel doing anything at the house..i dont feel cleaning washing..its beacuse i feel lonely, sad, not loved. when i go to bed i always cry..i'm really really confused.

please help...beacuse really soon i'm going to do something!


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 05-18-2003 - 12:56pm
What is it you're staying for, the warm feeling of love and caring you're getting from him or the captivating conversation and attention you get? Being alone may not be what you want, but it would certainly be an improvement in this situation. You're basically alone anyway and the only attention you do get is negative, losing those aspects would have a positive impact on you emotionally, not negative. You need to break out of that black fog you're living in in order to see the sunshine again.

Leaving makes sense, but I don't understand why you went back - and why you don't know if you'll leave again or not. It's no surprise you don't find motivation to do anything around the house, why would you? In your current situation you have nothing to look forward to and nothing positive to focus on, it's an existance, not living a life. You've made it clear you aren't happy and it's obvious this is not a relationship that should continue, can you imagine living the rest of your life like this? Of course not! The thing is, as long as you stay in your current situation, you have zero chance of finding happiness in your life or someone with whom you can be happy with. What's stopping you from making a change for yourself and your life?

If you can't make the move to get out of this miserable situation, you need to see a therapist or counselor and take a look at your self-esteem and self worth to see why you think this situation is acceptable for your life. No one should stay in the situation you describe.


"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
Sun, 05-18-2003 - 4:08pm
Maria, you're only 20 years old! Why do you feel the need to tie yourself down to a man who treats you like this? I agree that you need to work on your self-worth. Take a class, get a job, join a something so that you are not always at home waiting around for him. More than likely, the two of you will have more to talk about that way and things will get better. If they don't, walk out. Life is too short...