Honesty

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2006
Honesty
15
Mon, 06-19-2006 - 9:45pm
I have been married to my present wife for less than one year. It came up today and has in the past about being clean. That means showers. Her daughter hardly ever does and goes days without and is a pig! I lovingly tried to mention to my wife that I would prefer she shower in the evening, as I like to go to bed with my wife smelling nice/clean.To be kind. Womanly odor etc. She does have it after working all day. Physical job or not. . She does shower every day unlike her DD/ but it is always in the AM/. Well I am sorry She stated to me all I do is sit at a desk all day. SO what you sweat!!!!I think any man likes to go to bed with his wife clean! If she feels the need to wake up in the am and shower again do so.
My problem is just this. She insists she never showered in the evening when we met. I remember otherwise. She always did and cuddled up to me CLEAN.! Strictly now I feel because I told her about my ex and I considered that unacceptable. My ex always smelled like a fish! I think she feels so secure now she does no have to. WHAT!!!!! Hello? And I was kind when I mentioned it to her . She got all pissed off! and would not talk to me the rest of the night. FINE be A PIG do not respect your husband! I do have repsect for my spouse .
I even mentioned to her her ex said the same , she told me that now she denies it! Sorry I am the type of guy that showers every evening and in the AM. I am a very clean person! I go to bed to my wife clean! If she feels the need to be pissed at me for being honest and really not looking at what I said in a nice manner than she she has the problem not me. Also it can drive a man away! Not that she bothers with me anyway. i am starting to feel she does not care. And guess what?? I am a guy that cares alot about my wife! HELLO wake up!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to: nascarnutt
Tue, 06-20-2006 - 6:37pm

Nope, not a touchy subject.

Jen

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
In reply to: nascarnutt
Tue, 06-20-2006 - 6:42pm
Oops....



Edited 6/21/2006 2:17 am ET by iv_aisha2004
Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2006
In reply to: nascarnutt
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 6:31pm

nascarnut,

This is in no way a touchy subject for most women. Being disrespected is a touchy issue, showering is not.

A couple of thoughts:

-if there is any kind of 'fishy' odor, that is a sign of an infection, often bacterial vaginosis. This can be a recurring or persistent infection in some women. That can be treated.

-the fact that you think there is an issue with most women about smell makes me wonder about your attitudes towards women and sex. No one's ever asked me to shower before bed, or thought that anything smelled odd. This seems to be a recurring theme for you, so I suspect you don't feel comfortable with either women, sex or both. The disrespect and contorl issues evident in your posts would underscore this attitude. If you were my husband you'd be sleeping in the garage now. And soon to receive divorce papers.

jg

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2006
In reply to: nascarnutt
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 9:09pm
In all due respect to you, you have no clue to as who I am. I respect your opinion and your right to say and feel what you do. Thou shall not judge so to say.Obviuously you and others here do just that. It is your opinion. I do respect my wife and I have no control issues. Her ex is the one with just that. I do happen to love my wife very much and have always supported her and if you think not E-mail her and ask her . I am sure you know who she is. And your comment about just that is NOT appreciated in any manner! As aforementioned it is your opinion of me not who I am. Whatsoever. PERIOD!!! You have absolutely no clue as to what goes on in this household, or about me for that matter.Maybe at times I may not express myself in the best manner. Just maybe I shoot from the hip. I speak my mind and if others don't like it to bad! And about showers I take one at night to go to bed to my spouse CLEAN. Whatever other people do is their business. Out of respect and being a clean person I prefer to shower at night so when I retire with my wife I am just that! CLEAN.... I was honest as to my feelings here and you and others think I am controlling. You have No clue! Period. WHATEVER! to all of you! I really could care less what you and others think.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: nascarnutt
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 9:56pm

"I speak my mind and if others don't like it to bad!"And just as you have been, we have been honest and spoken our minds as well.


You're absolutely right, I don't know what goes on in your household, except for what you post here, and that is the source of my understanding of your mindset and behavior. I'm sorry you don't like my assessment, I am only basing it on what you have said.


When you've calmed down a bit, I hope you'll go back and reread all that you've posted in this thread. You've said "Whatever other people do is their business. " Your wife is "other people".


Best of luck.








~ cl-2nd_life

"Experience is what you get
when you don't get what you want."

~ Author unknown








"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"

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