I need some advice, my fiances ex is calling again. Sorry if it is a bit long!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2002
I need some advice, my fiances ex is calling again. Sorry if it is a bit long!!
7
Thu, 02-17-2011 - 1:16pm

Hello Everyone,

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009

She may not want your boyfriend back in a relationship at all. BUT, she's doing this to get attention from him, to stir up his life, to get a reaction because drama whores like her get a sense of fulfillment by involving other people in their drama, and by getting a reaction. She's not looking to trade in her boyfriend for yours, she's looking for a reaction to fuel her ego. Because she doesn't like the fact that your boyfriend has moved on from her and forgotten about her. That is kind of a rough feeling for us all - I think everyone wants to be remembered and cherished and not just moved on from, but that is what has to happen when a relationship ends. So she's trying to assuage a bruised ego.

I think you may get a better reaction from your boyfriend if you changed your argument.. Instead of focusing on what this girl's intent might be, focus on how it makes YOU feel.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004

Why is it so important to you and your boyfriend that her significant other should remain ignorant of her behavior?

Community Leader
Registered: 01-03-2004

Hi Aka,

I think you have a right to be concerned about your BF's EX calling him again. I suspect she was silent until she found out he was engaged. And your BF is very naive if he thinks she "doesn't mean anything" by these calls. She's up to no good.

My first piece of advice is your BF needs to ignore every contact from her. Delete her messages, texts, unheard. If she calls while you're home, he needs to let the phone ring and go to VM and then delete the message unheard. He should have no contact with her whatsoever.

If she persists he needs to confront her ONCE and say "Stop calling me. We're done. I'me engaged. I'm not interested in you any more. Good bye."

Community Leader
Registered: 05-14-2001

Welcome back Akarott ~

How long have you been out of your marriage?


~ cl-2nd_life

cl-2nd_
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
I think if she has no intention behind these calls, then WHY is she so worried about her fiance finding out about these calls. And WHY is she calling him on Valentines Day of all days. I think she is possibly fishing to see if he has any feelings left for her, or maybe she needs an ego boosting, or maybe things aren't going so well with her and the fiance so she is looking for attention from ex bf. Whatever it is, I don't think her intentions are innocent.
Community Leader
Registered: 05-14-2001

Akarott, I forgot to post your previous posts.


~ cl-2nd_life

cl-2nd_
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007

Akarott,