Jelousy

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2005
Jelousy
48
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 2:16pm

I need some advice.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
In reply to: flowergirl112
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 2:25pm

Hi flowergirl, I want to let you know first that we have a board specifically for this issue - It's called "Snooping and Jealousy", you might want to post this there too.

I think he should be treating you BETTER than his friends, not the same. It's not so special to call you "beautiful" and "funny" if he describes all his female friends this way.

What did he say when you first brought up this problem?

Are you also friends with his friends? Do you know them personally?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2005
In reply to: flowergirl112
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 2:41pm
Thank you, i will post on that board also.

When I first met him, he said he has always been friends with females (lived with a bunch of them in college) and I would have to deal with it. Now when I throw fits, he tries to accomodate.

I dont know any of his friends and he does not chat with them when I am with him. He says its because when we're together he is totally focused on me and wouldn't waste his time talking to other people when I'm there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
In reply to: flowergirl112
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 4:31pm

"throwing fits" is not adult communication. You can't throw a "fit" and expect to be catered to, it's very childish!

Does he have a problem with you meeting his friends? It sounds as though he's being secretive... Honestly this isn't a situation I'd put up with personally, and I am not really jealous of other women.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2005
In reply to: flowergirl112
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 5:13pm

That's part of the problem.. I don't act very adult like when I'm jealouse. Its emberrassing.

Its not that he is secretive, its that he keeps us separate.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2007
In reply to: flowergirl112
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 5:25pm
Flowergirl, how long have you two been an item?

Also, have you felt these insecurities with other men you have dated, or just this one?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2005
In reply to: flowergirl112
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 6:04pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2007
In reply to: flowergirl112
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 6:11pm

"I know he's super flirty and I have read his texts and emails to them."

What kinds of things do these texts and emails say?

Maybe this stuff would may anyone insecure - or leave.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2005
In reply to: flowergirl112
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 6:25pm

Okay so the one woman that I am currently upset about is in another state.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
In reply to: flowergirl112
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 7:09pm

I know this probably doesn't help you, but if it were me I'd dump Mr Wonderful and find a guy who didn't make me feel like I was just one in a dozen women he was trying to pick up.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2007
In reply to: flowergirl112
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 8:44pm

Yeah, I think that kind of stuff can make a decent woman insecure. I'm not sure how long I would have stuck around in the beginning though.

When I date a guy, I do want to feel that I'm his #1 and would not be comfortable with his doing this kind of stuff.

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