Marriage in trouble. HELP
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Marriage in trouble. HELP
| Thu, 09-14-2006 - 10:22am |
My DW and I have been together for 12 years married for 6. We started dating in high school. We have always been very goal oriented, worked two jobs each and just tried to be the best we could be for each other. Recently though the stress levels have been at a breaking point for me and I can't do anything but pick fights and put down my DW. I have embarrassed her in front of my family and make her feel so bad. I can't seem to break this cycle. She keeps talking about leaving and that she has given me 4 chances to come around and she is just sick of it and wants to have fun and move on. I have set a double standard that she is not ok with and I agree that it is not good, I didn't really realize it and since said ok to things she wants to do. We are both type A and both need to be in control, but lately I can't seem to listen and think about what I am saying. Like an idiot I just open my mouth and stupid comes out. I am in a tailspin and she seems to want to stop but every time we get grounded it happens again. I don't know what to do, she is a wreck and so am I please help. I know this is complicated.

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Counseling with a licensed marriage counselor. Good luck!
Jen
It's great that you are scheduled to see one in a few days. Woohoo for you guys.
One thing the cl here has said, which I really like, is do you act this way with your friends and coworkers? Do you treat them like you treat your wife? If you don't, then you are CHOOSING to treat her this way and you CAN control yourself and stop.
Just something to think about.
Jen
You chose to take them out on her. Why? It's not because you can't release them, otherwise you'd take them out on anyone. Why her?
Jen
Counseling is not necessarily going to be "easy."
It sounds to me like there are many issues that need to be addressed, a counselor is a very good place for the two of you to be.
Some informational posts from our Information and Resources section that may be of help to you:
Getting Over an Affair
Healing From Infidelity
Recurring Memories of Spouses Affair
~ cl-2nd_life"Experience is what you get
when you don't get what you want."
~ Author unknown
Edited 9/17/2006 11:02 pm ET by cl-2nd_life
"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"
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