normal feelings?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2006
normal feelings?
15
Thu, 09-28-2006 - 3:31pm
I am new too this and just wondering if this is normal blue feelings or something more to it. Lately I have felt really sad and longing for life feelings I have had long ago. The thrill of a new love or flirting with someone new or just the way I felt when I was younger. i am not that old only mid 20's but married w/ 2 beautiful children. I just feel sad and long for something from the past I don't have but I can't put my finger on what exactly. I love my husband and family and wouldn't dream of changing it or cheating or anything like that, I just find myself day dreaming of another person I know or flirting a bit to much at work. I guess I am hoping to have that "new" exciting feeling again I just have a hard time explaining what it is a I feel.

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
In reply to: katie220
Sat, 09-30-2006 - 9:06pm

**Kimbirdy, how I envy you being strong enough to redirect your thought patterns.


Well, it's not as easy as I made it sound! :)

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2006
In reply to: katie220
Sat, 09-30-2006 - 10:06pm

Ok here is a bit more details

Kate,
Married 2 kids

I came here to help figure myself out. I am infatuated with someone at work can't stop thinking about him, I'm very much in love with my husband and family I just love the feel when he comes around. I don't think he is aware of it at all he is also married. The good thing is he is only in our office maybe once a week for a few hours. I am trying to get past this as I have no plans to pursue this at all, but I just have him on my mind all the time. I have come to gather insite in how to deal with these feelings.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: katie220
Sun, 10-01-2006 - 10:39pm
Katie, I'm glad you let us know, having the problem of having a crush on one person is vastly different than wishing to be out playing in general.


I think we all have crushes from time to time, I know I have, and I know plenty of other women who have too. We're married after all, not dead! It'll get easier, and it will fade, but be forewarned, I doubt it will be the last crush you'll have! Hopefully knowing it's normal will help. Until it fades it's important to be very aware of keeping space between you. For me that means making sure not to be alone with him if that's at all possible; I also keep as much space between us as I can, an object between us is even better, like a desk, for instance, especially if you're talking one-on-one. It's not that I can't be trusted not to attack him or anything like that, lol, but distance makes sure no accidental contact is possible, and if there are any feelings on his side, it makes sure he doesn't "accidentally" brush up against you, etc. Yeah, a minor touch isn't such a big deal, but it can open the door to a longer touch next time, and so on and so on. Maybe I'm sounding nuts? I don't know, I just know that I keep as much distance between myself and the object of my crush as I can to assure no possibility of being tempted to take it farther. I'm sure I don't have to tell you that telling the guy you have a crush on him would not be a good thing to do, and I wouldn't recommend you tell your husband either.








~ cl-2nd_life

"Experience is what you get
when you don't get what you want."

~ Author unknown








"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2006
In reply to: katie220
Mon, 10-02-2006 - 10:09am
Thanks, I have been trying to take someones suggestiong of singing a song when he pops in my head, it actualy helps lol. I think space will be the key here. The only problem is my keyboard is broke so guess what that means, "big eye role here" no not on purpose I swear. thanks so much for your advice though those would be the 2 people I have no intent of reveiling anything too. Poor guy probley has no idea what so ever he thought he was just being nice. The weird thing is I have been have been talking to him for months now when he comes through and never ever did it ever cross my mind to be intrested in him and then last time bang there it was.I guess I will have to hold my breath when he comes this week. thanks again!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: katie220
Mon, 10-02-2006 - 11:36pm
Glad we could help! If he's the one who will be replacing your keyboard, maybe you could have somewhere else in the office you need to be while he's taking care of it, or go for coffee, etc.!


Most of the time, I think just knowing your feelings aren't unusual helps the most! What we often say around here is, it's not the attraction that's important, it's what you do about it that counts.








~ cl-2nd_life

"Experience is what you get
when you don't get what you want."

~ Author unknown








"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"

Pages