Reminder - Please Read!
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Reminder - Please Read!
| Tue, 04-25-2006 - 10:10am |
Please remember that anytime you post on a public message board
| Tue, 04-25-2006 - 10:10am |
Please remember that anytime you post on a public message board
"Ignoring the facts
does not change the facts"
Hi cmcorrine
I would like to say that the cl of a board should take the lead in not being condescending and insulting to people on the board when they post advice that she doesnt agree with. As you can see, there are a fair number of posters who are basically complaining about the same thing. This board has become a monopoly. Some people (not naming anyone) feel that they know best, and take it upon themselves to scare everyone else off when want.
Posting a patronizing message, with a condescending emoticon is as insulting to a person as being called an insulting word. I do understand that this is a fine line, and there is a great deal of subjectivity in judging whether a message is condescending and holds a superior tone or not.. but I will use the cliche here "when you see it you know it". Therefore this should also fall under the "TOS violations". I do hope in the future that you will be fair about all TOS violations. Noone who posts here should feel threatened by other people. This is a public message board. I hope it doesnt become a highschool playground.
Sincerely
i
Since I was unable to respond to the CL on the other string and because I believe everyone should get to express thier opinion as long as it meets the iVillage terms - this seemed to the best place to express my opinion with these hypothetical examples:
1. iVillage appoints a CL to the "Suicide Thoughts Help Message Board”. Someone posts that they have thoughts of suicide and there are all kinds of factors that make them think they should maybe do that. The CL posts that, in thier opinion, the poster should kill themselves.
2. iVillage appoints a CL to the "Help Me Fix My Relationship Message Board”. Someone posts that they have thoughts of ending their relationship and there are all kinds of factors that make them think they should maybe do that. The CL posts that, in thier opinion, the poster should end their relationship.
Either way, I believe, in my opinion, that iVillage should be held legally responsible for the damage that a CL does, while giving their opinion, as appointed leader of one of THEIR 'Help' boards.
Edited 3/22/2007 1:15 am ET by lled2
i agree - they are not doing anyone a service.
maybe the CLs should just stick to 'welcome to the board - hope someone has good advise for you?'
it is open for everyone's opinion, but when the operator of the a site such as this so negligently allows their own people - the CLs - to harm people with their poor advice - well then, iVillage should be help financially responsible for the damage caused by their own poor decisions if the person who is harmed by iVillage can show that thier life has been damaged by this companyies poor choices.
oh, to one of the other people that posted on here with their opinion - i understand other sites have shut down their message boards because they end up being dominated by a small group of people - just as you describe this site.
if you ask me, iVillage needs to shut down the help boards or hire qualified people to be the Community Leaders of their help boards if they are going to offer their opinions for help.
having the blind lead the blind is just plain crazy!!
Of course no one is responsible for their own actions, it's always someone elses fault. Right?
Advice can be given and a person can decide to take it or leave it. Ultimately, as grownups, WE are responsible for the choices WE make in our lives. Even if we decide to follow the advise of someone on ivillage WE decided to follow it. KWIM?
We can come here or a twelve step group or go to a therapist who is "qualified" to advise us but ultimately our choices are OUR responsibility. The fact that people are so litigious in our culture because they don't want to take responsibility for their own actions is a crock. Noone here is holding a knife to their back and forcing them to make a choice. If someone comes here looking for information they need to take responsibility to how they take that in. If they make life altering decisions based on advise of anonymous people on-line THEY have sought out, then wish to blame the other people, THEY are giving their own power away. How is that someone elses fault?
Ultimately we are all responsible for our own choices. We don't have to like what other people say, we don't have to like other peoples advise, we don't even have to take it, but we are grown ups and need to take responsibility for ourselves.
Please remember that it is hard to read tone in the written word and ones own mindset may give someone's words an intended slant by the way you read it.