Sudden shift in behavior. REALLY confused.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2010
Sudden shift in behavior. REALLY confused.
Sun, 10-23-2011 - 2:35am

I have been seeing this guy at my college. We are not in the relationship stage yet but I feel like were were getting there. First off let me say that he is VERY shy and pretty introverted but he is a real sweetheart. He came up to me a few weeks ago and asked me out.

Community Leader
Registered: 05-14-2001

It sounds like a really important assignment came up and he spent the day working on it.

~ cl-2nd_life

Avatar for ukgirl82
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2005
I don't see any shift in behavior - something important came up, he obviously spent the day in his room working on it. His behavior is consistent with what he told you. Sometimes, people are forced to cancel plans they were looking forward to... that's life. If you're curious what the assignment was that came up, just ask him the next time you talk.

What I find concerning is that you know he didn't leave his dorm all day and that his car didn't move - he may live in the dorms next to you but in order to know he never left his dorm, you'd have to have been watching almost nonstop - and to know his car didn't move, you'd have to have been observing it pretty closely too. That's pretty obsessive, especially considering he's done nothing to make your suspicions reasonable and you're not even "in the relationship stage yet". Honestly, it sounds like you're turning into a stalker. You need to be evaluating YOUR behavior, not his.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009

I'm inclined to agree with ukgirl, I think it's a little strange you were keeping an eye on his car but hey, it's not a huge deal. I just wonder why you're trying to catch him in a lie. You haven't ever forgotten an assignment until the last minute? 'Cause I sure did. You are overanalyzing... Be careful of trying to overanalyze a person you barely know.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008

I think you should give him some space. Maybe he miscalculated when he would have completed a huge assignment and coming up on the deadline got flustered.

In the future if there is a pattern of him canceling on you, then that is something to consider off kilter. Not this. :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2008

Checking in to see how it's going!