Why he stay at work so long??

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2004
Why he stay at work so long??
11
Thu, 07-07-2005 - 2:12am

hi there.. I have a very big question today.. I don't understand why my fiance turn to stay at work longer and longer hours...

it has been about a month now that he (my fiance) is staying at work for so long.. he usually work from 7.30 am until 4.30 or 5 pm and come home either by 5 or 5.30 to have dinner with me.. lately he did not call to tell me that he will be home late and he is still at work until 6 or 7 pm and when i picked him up after work (just sometime) as he didn't take the car ( and leave it for me). He didn't react like before.. before everytime i drop by as a surprise to pick him up from work he will be more than happy .. these days he looks worry and nervous and this morning he told me that if I gonna pick him up again on my way back please call the office first to let him know.. (the office number because he lost his mobile phone)

He has been working very hard.. when he comes home he didn't want to talk.. sometime he didn't even want dinner he said that he has already eaten some pizza from work or something like that.. he will be too tired to even talk to me.. he just want to watch tv then go to sleep and get up to go to work..

however, i feel that lately he has been having a very angry feeling toward me with everything i do.. everything i do seems to be wrong for him or not rights... he is very grumpy

like last weekend.. we had a big fight about the wedding planning.. he went to check out few places for our venues with me and on Sunday's evening, he screamed at me that he can't handle it anymore.. he said that i supposed to do all the wedding things by myself and finishing it up long time ago.. he said that i have been slow and wait for him while he got so much on his hands like work and stuff..

I might be slow on the wedding plan but i just never see he so angry at me like this (maybe once in earlier stage of our relationship when i first moved in). so I feel nervous.. i was waiting for him to see with me because i thought that we could make a decision together..

anyway, i wonder if he likes someone else at work as well or he just work harder because it is the last month before the end semester ( he is a principle of a school). his ways of staying in office and his moods toward me just make me wonder.. I don't want to be paranoid but please help what to do..

Thank you
Kathy
should i just calm down and act as normal or? by the way this weekend is his Birthday and he needs a break from the city so we are going away for the beach.. should i say anything and if so what should i ask ?

I was upset as well because i thought that he would have told me eariler and tell me nicely instead of screaming and led to a big arguement..

Kathy

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Avatar for lucy4980
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-11-2005 - 12:17pm
I definitely agree with what you have said. Stress is very powerful and takes a lot out of a person. When I am super busy with stuff, like the end of the semester when finals are coming up, I don't have a heck of a lot of energy for anything "extra-curricular" either. Between work, school, and basic things that need to be done, the only thing I want to do with my free time is veg on the couch and watch TV or sleep. This isn't a problem because my husband totally gets this. He knows that if he waits another week, finals will be over and he gets his wife back. We make sure to plan some stuff just the 2 of us when finals are over and we can relax. In a couple days we are leaving on a camping trip - 5 days, nothing to do, just the two of us.

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