And that, my friend, is what you call...

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
And that, my friend, is what you call...
6
Fri, 10-14-2005 - 2:09pm

CLOSURE. I just realized that this is my first day as a completely free woman, as the waiting period for finalization ended yesterday. Woohoo! And to think when I separated I thought I couldn't wait a year to be divorced. Instead it took 3 years (don't worry, dear readers, this probably won't happen to you-I didn't have money to fight my ex so I waited him out. When he moved in with OW suddenly Mr. Argumentative became Mr. Agreeable-Can't-Wait-To-Get-Divorced.), but it's finally done done done!

For those of you out there just starting or still in the process, hang in there, because this feels great.

-sang

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Fri, 10-14-2005 - 5:29pm

Wow.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2005
Fri, 10-14-2005 - 11:16pm
Glad to hear you are happy. I too am afraid my divorce will last a long time because my H will fight me tooth and nail b/c he owns a company. If you have read my posts, since he found out I filed for D, he now says he wants to try to work things out after there was no chance at all. He never did like to share his $$$ and now he is really mad and the thought of him sharing his money with me is worse than him losing all to attys so he will probably fight to just say I told you so b/c he wanted to do this his way with a list of my needs, not my wants, but my needs and said he would take care of me and our DD and give me anything I wanted. But I had to remember this is a man that recently admitted that he has cheated for 18yrs that is as long as I have known him, so he can not be trusted. Therefore, I got an atty before him and he was shocked. Now he tells me we are going to lose everything to attys but he wants to know if there is any hope for us to get back together. I told him that the way he treats me during this divorce will determine the kind of relationship, if any that we will have. He admits it is all his fault that our marriage failed and that I was the best wife and mother, but he messed things up. If he is a real man, he'll do the right thing , but not so sure he is a real man.
I am really sad and loved my H so much and feel my life is being turned upside down and inside out. When i hear stories like yours it gives me hope that maybe one day, I too will be happy again. I just hope I don't have to go through this for 3 yrs. I can't imagine.
Thanks for sharing.
Lisa
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Sat, 10-15-2005 - 11:28pm
Congrats Sang... you deserve all the best!


Karen ~ wildlucky4me


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
Mon, 10-17-2005 - 2:16pm

Hugs, Lisa. When the process started for me, I was so miserable. I couldn't believe that my life had turned into such a mess and didn't know how I could possibly start again. But now, I am much happier than I ever was with my ex. Perhaps once your ex accepts that you are following through on the divorce he will be willing to come to a fair agreement. While he may say he'll make the lawyers rich, when it comes down to it maybe he'll be concerned about his pocket enough to negotiate with you.

-sang

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Mon, 10-17-2005 - 2:28pm

You go girl. I love your title. "Friends" is a favorite show of mine. CLOSURE. Does sound nice. I had a bit of closure myself over the weekend. Or more of a FINAL KNOCK ON THE HEAD the showed me there was just no glimmer of hope for this being a civil co-parenting situation. At least not right now anyway.

Good for you honey.

HOORAY

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
Mon, 10-17-2005 - 2:44pm

LOL, I wondered whether anyone would recognize the Friends reference. That episode is one of my faves & and the wording just seemed so appropriate here.

Hang in there, luv. I never would have thought my ex could become civil and act reasonably toward me, yet he finally has. He hasn't changed - he's still a jerk to his current gf - but since I refuse to let him get under my skin (that he can see, anyway), he's stopped trying. I hope in time you'll be able to have a better relationship with your ex.

-sang