any advice?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2006
any advice?
15
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 9:35pm

stbx was served again today. since 8:00 pm, he has sent me at least 8 text messages that aren't very nice. i've deleted them, but now i am wondering, is this some kind of harrassment? do i really need to put up with this crap?

i will call my lawyer tomorrow, but can someone give me some insight please????

what

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Avatar for momtojoeybear
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: whatabadidea
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 9:44pm

I would consider it harrassment and I would strongly advise you not to delete any more of the messages--at least until you speak with your attorney tomorrow. If you can remember anything that the deleted text messages said, I would also write that down, as some sort of documentation...

Good Luck and let us know what your lawyer says!

Julie

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2006
In reply to: whatabadidea
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 8:34am

My dear, save those messages or print them out or something. It may be harrassment, but you will need the evidence. Oh my dear, I am sorry. I hope somehow this all ends soon and you can rebuild your life!

M

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2006
In reply to: whatabadidea
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 10:53am

that was good advice. i sent the text messages to my email and printed the ones i saved.

what truly bothers me is this: he told me that i was heartless, uncaring, and that all i care about is money. well no f*&%ing BS. you need money to pay your mortgage, pay your utilities, put food on the table, put braces on your childrens teeth, buy eyeglasses for them so they can see, buy your children clothing. and guess what else? you need a job to get money to do these things. preferably one with health insurance so you can pay for doctor visits and MEDICATION YOU STUPID GOOD FOR NOTHING DRUNK SLEEPING ON MY F*&%ING COUCH!!!!!!!!

Wow am i angry!! i paid for and prepared 6 meals for him on saturday, i gave him gas money, i made him breakfast sunday morning when he showed up at my new house univited and unannounced. but yet some how, some way i am a heartless cold person.

what
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2006
In reply to: whatabadidea
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 11:04am

Wow. We are living the same life. I hear it all the time-all you care about is money. Just like you said-No S***-when it is all falling apart before your eyes and you are wondering how you are going to buy groceries to feed your kids it tends to move to the top of your worry list. GET A JOB.

HANG ON

M.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2006
In reply to: whatabadidea
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 12:16pm

Oh no no no no ... oh, it must be breaking your heart. To care enough for him to do what you have done: cook, pay, cook some more and then have him lash out. Of course the greatest betrayal is his not cleaning up his act and getting back to work and caring for his family -- oh, honey!

Yes, yes, yes, talk to your lawyer -- somehow this has to stop. When can you clear the contents of the house (I was thinking of YOUR couch) before foreclosure; when does that happen?

You don't deserve this -- let someone else take care of him (his brother/father etc).

Stay in touch; know we are here!

M

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2006
In reply to: whatabadidea
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 12:26pm

i may end up having a TIA over this one today. omg, i am not perfect, but come on.

stbx takes paxil and bp meds. he is out of both. maybe thats why hes where he is emotionally.

what
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2006
In reply to: whatabadidea
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 1:12pm

and it gets better

i pay his direct tv bill, his water bill, his gas and electric because he has no money.

again, i'm the cold heartless bad evil person.

i just can't cut him off. he's mental and its cold outside.

what
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
In reply to: whatabadidea
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 1:43pm
Has your ex ended up stopping the Paxil all at once? Paxil is an antidepressant that must be titrated down before stopping. It has horrible side effects of mood swings and even suicide when levels are not slowly brought down. Be careful with him it may make his behavior unpredictable. Take care of yourself. Hugs, Brenda

Hugs, Brenda 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2006
In reply to: whatabadidea
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 2:18pm

I'm speechless. Talk to your lawyer, but I think you need to stop. You are going to be hit up for spousal support. The house is going to the bank, anyway, right.

I know, if I were in your shoes, I might do much the same (if there were the money), but ... oh my gosh ...

I will pray for both our families.

M

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2006
In reply to: whatabadidea
Thu, 03-01-2007 - 2:57pm

m-

i'm not sure a judge would make me pay him support unless he is unable to work. (ie disabled) he has a long history of quitting jobs and taking months off at a clip to "relax".

brenda

i know the effects of stopping paxil. i too am worried that he is going to fall off the deep end. last thursday night he followed me and sat in his car until i left the restaurant and followed me home. its weird.

c

what

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