ARGH! What is child support for exactly

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
ARGH! What is child support for exactly
6
Wed, 02-01-2006 - 8:04pm

I have posted on a few boards on IVILLAGE. I think this is my first post here. I am sure I am not the only one with an ex who thinks every little expense is "COVERED BY CHILD SUPPORT".

We have been divorced for 2 years. I have 2 kids (DD almost 16 and DS 12). The latest is my daughters driver's ed expenses. My new husband and I bought her a car (1989 Jeep) and plan on paying the insurance. We told her to ask him for driver's ed for her birthday (next week). He told her it is "PART OF CHILD SUPPORT". I have forked over the money for her 8th grade trip to DC, her 9th grade band trip to LA, and this year her band is going to Montreal. Which I have also paid!

Granted, he makes very good money, so I make out better than most divorced mothers. Am I wrong to feel this way?

Thanks.

Karen

P.S. He is taking me to court next week to get out of paying alimony. Although I remarried, it was never a clause in our divorce. Plus, he cheated on me numerous times (which I can prove), but I went easy on him so the kids would not be part of a nasty divorce. SOME THANKS!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2006
Wed, 02-01-2006 - 8:11pm

My atty says it's to cover normal everyday expenses. However, w/out a clause stating that ex is to pay a certain share of extra expenses I don't know if you can make him short of going back to court and changing the orders. Have you kept receipts of all the expenses? It would help a lot if you can show that you spend well over his c/s and that you are paying for extra expense by yourself. Of course seek some sort of legal counsel to make sure of your rights/options in your area.

Hope I could help
Katkat

Avatar for eatatmoms
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-01-2006 - 8:47pm

How annoying! My attorney has told me (and my stbx) that child support covers daily expenses like having a roof over their heads, electricity, food, gas in the car etc. Anything above and beyond is divided in 1/2 - medical expenses, field trips, clothing etc. So far my stbx has paid his share of extra expenses, but in his own sweet time.

Melanie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 02-01-2006 - 10:04pm

Hey..... child support is basically to cover normal, everyday food, clothing and shelter basics.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2004
Thu, 02-02-2006 - 11:07pm
I agree with the other posters, but here are my thoughts in case a judge were to decide that he isn't obligated to pay alimony anymore. I would think the judge would at least review it. Maybe in exchange for not paying alimony, he would agree to pick up some of the extra expenses. You have paid for 3 MAJOR trips so far, I don't think that is fair that he not pitch in for things like that. My ex won't either and says "that was YOUR decision to enroll them in such and such not MINE". He's a pr##ck! He thinks $180-250 is more than enough for two kids, even though their school lunches have cost me $120 last month alone! I think your ex can stand to pay some of these expenses, especially if he wants no more alimony payments, maybe you will have something to bargain with. If not then I would take the alimony payments and use them for the kids too! Good luck!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 02-03-2006 - 11:26am
I hate it when they have that attitude.... yes, it's "my decision" to choose to let my children participate in activites that enrich their minds and help them to grow into smart, successful adults!.... and both parents should share in wanting that for their children.

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2004
Fri, 02-03-2006 - 5:12pm
It really is, and he makes everything about him. How things affect HIM, he doesn't think of the kids and what they need. He refused to take the kids for a week to try to punish me and guilt me out of closing his child support case, which I refused to do. He pouted for a week and when I made other arrangements for the kids, he all of a sudden decided that he wanted them this weekend! AAAGGHH! Then he had to take it a step further and write me an email about how I am keeping him AWAY from the kids! I was like WTF! You are the one who refused them for a week to punish me! It's just so frustrating sometimes; I never thought I would be in this situation, but there are so many of us I guess!