Back to school expenses
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Back to school expenses
| Sun, 08-28-2005 - 6:58pm |
I'm really discouraged with back to school shopping. I had $253 worth of clothes and shoes I bought at Wal-Mart and I bought my daughter a new pair of "trendy" shoes at the mall and it's still not enough. I worked last saturday an extra 8 hour shift and worked on call from 7pm-1am to help pay for all this stuff. I have no clue what my ex has bought for them. My daughter still needs three ring binders and they needs pencils and pens and book covers. Arrrrrrrrr. I don't dare ask what he's gotten them for fear of getting my head bit off.

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I hear ya!.... It's so expensive.
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~
I know what you mean. My ex wanted to cut
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~
right, his visitation is "reasonable" ( worded as in the divorce decree ) not even set to be every other weekend or 2 weeks. So what I am getting is based on me having them everyday.
He called me and asked to have one of our children for 2 weeks, sort of a last minute thing.
My attorney told me that my stbx needs to pay 1/2 of all extra expenses like back to school clothes, medical appointments, activities ect. She said the usual child support I get is for the roof over their heads, the food they eat, gas in the car etc. So far it's been okay, but like I posted another time, I feel like I'm begging when I ask for the extra 1/2. The truth is I'm extremely frugal, so he's getting off very easy. My parents bought all the supplies from the PTA, my income is so low I don't have to pay for registration fees and they're on the lunch program. All I bought for back to school so far are two pair of shoes for each kid and a new coat for DS. I
Took 5yr DD for school shopping here and there. X had her for 2 weeks earlier this month and then had her again for 5 days last week and then the few days I did take her school shopping he told me "I was going to take her...."
Ok you had a heck of a lot more days to take her then I did so why just when I do it it is aproblem. Didn't say that though. Wanted too but didn't. He said last Friday "I will get her what she needs for school next weekend. Whatever she needs I will get for her!" (ummm school starts tomorrow but he will get it all for her NEXT weekend - yeah ok knock yourself out. I just said OK.
LIttle does he know the little bit of child support he has paid so far I have scraped and saved and already got her - her winter coat online and her hat. I can tell him hey I got her this and that but she really still needs this but he waits and waits and then asks me again what does she need and when does she need it and either I get it WAY WAY later or not at all. (By the way got a nice Columbia coat for my DD at CAMPMOR.COM they are having blow out clearance sales and they are not KNOCK OFFS. Last Columbia coat lasted almost 3 yrs for my DD)
I feel good when I know that I take care of my DD. When I spend money it goes all on her. And I have how many more years of school shopping???? WOW!!!
Good luck!!
I've paid over $200.00 for supplies alone....and that's not including clothes yet. I feel like I'm supplying the entire school with these supplies!!! I dont remember it like this before.....Insane!!!
I guess I look at CS a bit differently.
While there may be months that I spend more money on my son, there are also months when I spend hardly anything on him. So in the end I think it all evens out so I wouldn't ask my ex for ANY additional money. At the beginning of each season my son has higher expenses because he needs new clothes appropriate for the season since last's season's no longer fit. But, other than that I truely don't spend much on him.
But I think I also consider living expenses differently than many divorced moms. I consider mortgage and utility payments an adult responsibility so I don't use child support for those things. If I didn't have a child I would still have a mortgage payment, phone bill, water bill etc. Granted, I probably wouldn't live in as big a house as I do, but ultimately that is my decision, not my son's, so I still see it as my adult expense. My ex rarely pays CS but when he does it either gets spent directly on my son or goes into his college account.
I also remind myself that my ex's child support was never intended to pay for ALL of my son's expenses, only a portion of them.
Hi,
I'm sure you didn't intend your post as a put down on moms such as me who do use CS to help pay usual bills, but I feel the sting and therefore feel the need to explain my situation.
I was married for 14 years, together with my stbx for 17 we were 18 and 19 when we met. I worked and put him through school so he could earn an engineering degree. Our DD was born a month after graduation. I was to go back to school when our next child went to kindergarten. I never got to because stbx lost his high paying job and I was forced back to work to a very low paying job to support all of us. This was after he tried to have an affair and generally was negelctful toward our children and me for YEARS. After TWO years of supporting our family on just above
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