Be careful what you wish for...
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Be careful what you wish for...
| Sun, 09-24-2006 - 3:34pm |
you might just get it.
Anyone else here the one who left who is now regretting it? Is emotional neglect a legitimate reason to leave a 17 year old marriage? Now, that you've been gone for a few months and enjoying your independence do you feel guilty when you talk to him and he says he wants you back, will forgive everything and is willing to make changes? Is an affair forgiveable? Even though it was the wake up call you both needed? Can you ever get "it" back? Do you really want to?
So many questions. Any answers?

I can only anwer these questions from my own perspective. I'm sure other will wiegh in as well.
No, I do not regret leaving my marriage.
I feel that it is. I left my 12-year relationship (7 years of marriage) largely due to neglect.
I went through this for many months after my separation. I did feel horrible guilt, and sometimes, I still do. I tend to have a guilt complex anyway. But I knew my marriage was killing me emotionally, spiritually, and it even felt like it was killing me physically. While I felt guily, I needed to do it to preserve myself.
I really don't know. I'm sure some people can forgive. I was never really able to forgive my ex for his EA while I was pregnant.
I learned the hard way, but returning to a marriage because of guilt is not the answer. I tried it once, and it didn't work, only to divorce a few years later.