Checking back in

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-06-2005
Checking back in
5
Wed, 01-25-2006 - 9:51pm

I have been so busy I have not even had time to check in and see how everyone is and whine about myself. Geez, what kind of life is that!

So for the most part I have been doing well. My mother helped me buy dressers and is helping me fix up my room. She wants me to make it my own.

I have been having a few up and down days. I have discovered that Sunday's and Monday's are my worst.

Tonight I had to call my husband and talk to him about our 15 year old daughter that is spinning out of control. I asked him if he had time to sit down and talk, I also told him that I had not seen him and it would be nice to see him again. He said very coldly, yeah, I gotta go. I asked him what it meant and he told me he was just busy. This is the same man that kisses me each day, tells me he loves me and gives me hugs. I know I should not have asked but I am truly missing him, I wish it would just go away I don't want to miss him anymore.

If I had been smart I would have written all of the reasons that I can't stand him. Maybe it would have helped.

OK done venting.

How has everyone else been holding up?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 01-25-2006 - 10:21pm

I feel ya..... and with mixed signals like that, I'd need to vent, too.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2006
Wed, 01-25-2006 - 11:08pm
Hi, Chicky! It's good to hear from you. I'm sorry he was so cold to you. I know how hard it is to deal with. My stbx is the same way. He has absolutly no compassion anymore. He was the most affectionate man I ever knew and he just shut it all off. :( Hugs!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-06-2005
Wed, 01-25-2006 - 11:18pm

I know I just don't get how you just stop. But the fact that he still shows some sign of emotion is hard. I guess I just wish I still had him around when things suck. He was my best friend for so long. And I am just suppose to stop. I don't get this.

I know I know it's not going to ever happen again but I just wish I had enough time to shut down like he did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-06-2005
Wed, 01-25-2006 - 11:20pm

Thanks I like the up days much better. I know he won't talk to me because I know how he feels towards me and he is afraid he will have feelings again.

I am mostly hanging in but wow if when my daughter is acting up that it is not hard to not want him here to say it will be ok.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2006
Wed, 01-25-2006 - 11:38pm
Makes perfect sense, hon! I keep telling stbx to tell me how to do it. I want to know how to just turn your feeling off and on at it your convience. My stbx will show some little sign of emotion on a rare occasion. He will kiss me and say "can't we still do that?" Even having it happen rarely plays havic with my emotions to the point that I don't know how to feel or get past it. I can't imagine of it happened more often. I just keep telling myself that one day I will look back and realize that through it all I did prevail, without having to lower myself as a person or losing any of my faith or conviction, I prevailed! And in the end it will only make me stronger. Same goes for you, hon! One day we'll get there! :)