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|Tue, 07-15-2014 - 12:10am|
Hi everyone so my wife and I have been married for a few years and we have recently decided that maybe we should part ways but I feel torn about whether or not to do it. I know that we still love each other but it just seems like we are not connecting anymore. We've tried counseling more than once over the years and it helped us fight less but didn't seem to bring us closer together. We seem to end up back at the core issues of intimacy (lack of) and I feel very guilty to say that that is now a dealbreaker after I married her because I knew this was an issue before the wedding. But I guess because we had a good period of time before the wedding that things were getting better. It's not just about sex, we just seem to feel connected very rarely. Drs have run tests and there are no issues to explain it.
I think the biggest issue is that now that we cannot seem to connect emotionally or intimately, I feel drawn to find that deep emotional connection with others. It's never been intentional but I worry that if I just grit my teeth and push through that I might end up unfaithful. I don't believe in cheating. I don't ever plan to but how do I deal with the guilt of ending a marriags because of emotional/physical intimacy. It makes me feel like a jerk because it seems like a petty issue (unlike abuse or adultery). Had anyone ever gone through this?
We are still living together because we cannot afford to both move out and it seems like neither of us wants to rush this. But feeling this way makes me feel anxious.
Any advice is so appreciated.