Confused
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| Fri, 01-26-2007 - 10:35pm |
Hi this is my first time on this board. I have been a member of other boards a few years ago and know how great and supportive ivillage members are.
My husband just left yesterday.. I am hurt and sad.. can't stop crying... But I was the one that asked for him to leave. We were together for 10 years and I am terrified. Our marraige was full of mostly downs, verbal abuse, control, drinking, online cheating.. I mean I know why... I would, could never be happy with this person... but I sit here crying.
I think my biggest hurt right now is the fact that I found out he left my house and went to another womens house.. I feel replaced and disguarded...but why why do I care.... I WANTED THIS... sorry for the capps just yelling at myslef!
I have ben trying for 3 months to try to make this a "friendly" split... yes I am crazy... I sat and talked and held him as he cried... When he threatened to hang himself on new years day I begged him not too... and when he walked out finally and reminded me of my reasons... calling me names and telling me he hopes the next person I am with beats the $#!t out of me... yes warm parting words... then why why and I soooooo sad and crying...
THank you for letting me vent... I am just so hurt right now and I just want to get back to the reasons I made the decision...
Thank you for listening
Paula

Hi Paula,
It's a change... even if you know it's for the best.
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~